Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: We are not open to new posts at this time
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Morning All,
I was given a Contact Order 20th November 2012 to see my son, 90mins once a fortnight, at a Contact Centre of my Ex's chosing.
Given the fact that it will be 1 calender month tomorrow since the order was made and I have not heard from a Contact Centre about appointments etc would the timing be right to ask the Court for an Enforcement Order?
This matter is slightly complicated by the fact of Christmas approaching and the courts will be closing and my ex will be using the holidays as an excuse to "drag her feet" over this issue.
Thank you in advance,
Brian
Hi Bri,
I would write to her solicitor and say that you have not been notified of a date and place for contact and it has been over a month since the judge ordered this. Express your unhappiness at the length of time it is taking and then give them a deadline for sorting it out, of say 14 days. Use the usual solicitor speak.....if I have not heard from you by xxxxxx then I will have no alternative but to return to court for enforcement of the order...etc. You could even find a contact centre and suggest that they contact them so that contact can be initiated. Just in case they come back with something like they have been looking for one and havent been able to... Cover all the bases and they cant then make excuses!
Good luck with it all 🙂
Not sure if it helps any but I had the same at the beginning of this year…court ordered contact she refused unless it was in a contact centre….i got the details of the contact centre from cafcass and contacted them myself to ask…they’d not seen the order so I sent them a copy and it took them a couple of weeks to find a slot for us. Total time was around 6 weeks from the order to actually having the first session…there had to be recommendation from the Court to them before they would process the paperwork.
I know this is not what you want to hear but most contact centres have a limited number of spaces. At least that’s what I was told at mine, plus they were a charity organisation and run by a group of volunteers.
This time of year is the most stressful for parents missing their kids and I really feel for you.
I’ve not seen my little one for 4 ½ months now despite there being a contact order in place…..i don’t need a contact centre as I’ve jumped through every hoop the ex put in front of me and the courts have seen that she’s just done her best to disrupt contact because she thinks she can do what she likes!
So with the judge’s recommendations if I wan’t to get contact reinstated the only thing left for me is an Enforcement order……..so I’ve put in an application for the Enforcement order but that won’t be heard until end of Jan. You can guess my frustrations at how long these things drag on for! It all depends on how much the ex decides to fight you! mine is a real piece of work I can tell you!!
Anyway….keep your chin up….don’t lose focus and do not lose you temper or be aggressive with the contact centre or your ex for how long its taking…..the best advice I can offer here is be the bigger man…do not rise but keep every note of delays for the next time you’re in court….at least it’ll show you’ve been doing everything expected of you and its her/her solicitor who have dragged things out!
How does it work? The orginal center where I was supposed to meet my child was run by a charity hiwever they gave you 6 sessions there and after that you were expected to sort out your own arrangements. Feel for you as well mate not seen my child since 2008! Court papers submitted this week so hopping that next Christmas my child will be with me for a week.......watch this space.
In my case because I had only seen my little one a handful of times through 2011 with several months at a time broken contact by the ex….we agreed on 6 sessions at the contact centre….but when the ex broke those the judge ordered a further 3 to make up for the lost ones.
The ex did what she could to delay things so there were gaps in contact again until end of june when she agreed to let contact away from the contact centre…although this was forced on her by the judge as I’d jumped through all the ex’s hoops for over 18mths!
I know that there was another Dad at the contact centre we used who had been going there for many more months than the 9 Saturdays (in 3mths) that we were there. they only ran the centre 3 Saturdays of the month. And from what I know of the other ones around the area (Notts) they usually run once a fortnight.
Not sure if there was a minimum for contact centres, i know when chatting with the organisers they did say they were there to support contact for as long as was needed until court said there was no more need for it.
I’m fairly sure that in my case if the Judge hadn’t seen through the lies and deception of my ex that I’d be still at contact for as long as the ex wanted! However…the judge has seen through her lies….but the ex is still preventing contact and going against the court orders…….although you can imagine just how devastated I am not seeing my son while she does what she thinks she can get away with!!
How wrong she is!!! 🙂
Either she’ll pack in being so stupid and not go against the courts…or she’ll be locked up! (Fingers crossed!!) then maybe I’ll get much more time with my little one
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
