[Solved] Ex-Wife dictating access

Hi Coolesmudge

thanks for your post - i'll send your thread to our legal experts over at the childrens legal centre and get them to reply with some of their great advice. This might take them a few days so please keep popping back to check.

Dear Coolsmudge,

Thank you for contacting the Children’s Legal Centre, an independent charity concerned with law and policy affecting children and young people.

When parents separate, and there are no court orders in place, then the parent with whom the child lives is able to control all contact that the child has with other people, including the other parent.

Contact is the right of the child, not the parents, and until the child is old enough to make decisions for themselves all contact can be controlled by the resident parent.

If you are not happy with the contact being offered then the first step is usually to suggest to your wife that you attempt mediation to come to an agreement that you are both happy with.

If mediation is not successful or your wife refuses to attend then you have the option of making an application to court for a contact order. A contact order is the only legally binding way of ensuring contact with your child.

To make an application to court you are able to represent yourself or use a solicitor. If you are eligible for legal aid it is advisable that you seek representation from a solicitor and you are able to find solicitors in your local area using the ‘Find a Solicitor’ tool on the Law Society website.

To represent yourself you can download the forms from www.hmcs.gov.uk . The forms you require are the C100, CB1 and CB3. The C100 form is the application for an order, and the other forms are guidance on the court process, serving the forms on the mother and other information you would need to know.
When filing the C100 at the Family Proceedings Court there is a fee of £175.

The court will make you and the mother aware of any dates that you must attend court and would hear the views of you both. There will generally be several hearings and CAFCASS may be asked to speak with your daughter and submit a report and recommendations to the court of what should happen. The weight placed on your daughter’s opinion will depend on her age and maturity at the time of the proceedings.

There is a presumption that contact with both parents is best for a child when it is safe to allow this, and a contact order is rarely refused unless there is very good reason for this.

A contact order is legally binding and if this is granted your wife may be penalised if she breaches what is stated in the order.

With regards to your wife’s new partner, it is for each parent when they are caring for a child to decide who that child should see, and this will include new partners unless there is something put in place by the courts, police or social services (for which extremely serious reasons would be required).

If the mother is allowing this new partner to be around your child, or decides that she wishes to live with this person, then you will not be able to prevent this or do anything about it, except to negotiate with your wife, however it will be her choice.

If you have real reason to believe that this man may pose a risk to your daughter, you can contact the social services, however there will need to be a belief that your daughter is at risk of harm for them to become involved.

We hope this information is useful to you. Should you require further advice please contact our Child Law Advice Lien on 0808 8020 008 and an advisor will be happy to help.

Kind Regards

Children’s Legal Centre