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False allegations o...
 
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[Solved] False allegations of domestic abuse from April.


Posts: 26
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Topic starter
(@FatherChristmas)
Eminent Member
Joined: 12 years ago

I'm guessing that there will be a few of these made in the run up too and especially after the removal of legal aid for family matters, my ex-partner has already jumped on the band wagon.

But what I want to know, is there anyway that someone who is unjustly being accused of such things do anything to stop the false accusations and/or prove their innocence, because in all fact, if they have done nothing wrong then they themselves are the victim.

My ex-partner has gone as far as abuse charities and support groups, getting her 'so called' version of events logged, etc. All apparently taking place within the last few months, and all when I pick up and drop my children off at the door of a house in a very public street. Surely I myself could go to a charity and claim to be the victim too, but where is the sense in any of it all?

What can I/we do, I'm sure that I'm not, or won't be the only dad in this situation given a little more time?

5 Replies
5 Replies
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(@Babyreecesdaddy)
Joined: 13 years ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 127

I wish I could help but I too would love to know the best way of proving something that never happened.

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(@bobbya)
Joined: 13 years ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 149

Unfortunately there doesn't seem much you can do in order to proove these things didn't happen, I know this only too well.
The shear fact that she has alleged it seems to be enough for support groups and womens aid and ultimately the courts to believe her......

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(@FatherChristmas)
Joined: 12 years ago

Eminent Member
Posts: 26

It does seem absolutely ludicrous that anyone, be it male or female, mum or dad can make allegations of abuse for the courts to simply believe them or take it into account with no shred of concrete evidence.

Surely there must be some form of law against this, and if not and all the accused stands to do is lose out, is it not a logical (but rather pathetic) step to play fire with fire and do the same given that there is nothing else that accused person can do?

Also, just out of interest and given that both my name and my children's names would have more than likely have been mentioned in any reports that she's made would I not be able to request a copy of them under data protection laws?

Many thanks.

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(@tiredoffighting)
Joined: 14 years ago

Trusted Member
Posts: 46

My partner was accused twice (arrested and cautioned once, released no charge the second), due to his ex-wife's behaviour. All I would suggest is that maybe someone else do the drop off's and collections (grandparents, friends etc) then this takes you out of the equation. MY ex was accused by the courts/guardian/social of arguing with his ex at contact, which he was not. He took a dictaphone (can't be used in court, but our was used pre-court and that soon shut people up!). It's hard to prove your not to blame. Maybe you could suggest a neutral spot i.e a contact centre (if you suggest this, it's looks like you are trying to remedy a situation - and that can only work in your favour! 😉 [censored] for tat doesn't work and can make you look as bad as them and the court does not like that one bit.

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(@Ivan Dobski)
Joined: 13 years ago

Reputable Member
Posts: 181

Record the convo's at hand over discreatly even better if you have someone recording from your car on a camera phone etc nothing worse than having your name dragged through it just so they can cheat the system. On my CAFCASS report the EX claimed I was abusive to her and threw and object at her which I did during an argument but I just threw a hair brush on the floor, Still what relevence this had in a CAFCASS case as it happend before the child was born I dont know. I'd bet it was trying to get the legal aid re-instated.

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