Hi,
I'm not there yet but my separated wife and her parents fill my children's heads with so much [censored] its unbelievable. My wife is an alcoholic and has been for a few years and refuses to get help. Her family are aware of this but in denial, and things came to a head recently and she moved in with the children with her parents. I'm not proud of how Ive acted but myself and the children have been pushed so far its broken us and I resorted in the following actions.
After years of denial, I started photographing the empty wine bottles, the plastic bottles that had had vodka in and my wife in various states either on the couch or passed out in our bed. I also videoed her antics in an attempt to make it even more real and make her admit her problem and get some help. I knew this was wrong, but I can assure everyone on her that I had tried everything I could think of to help her and make her stop.
She didn't like her cameo appearances but didn't stop drinking either, claiming it was sick and would probably make her drink more! The children were aware of the situation, and on one particularly bad night in May, walked into the bedroom while I was videoing her and telling her to leave only to join in and start screaming at her to just leave and go away. I have to admit, I carried on filming with my phone because I thought once she saw it, she would stop as it was horrible to see.
This didn't work, and we go on like we have for a few more months with mummy drinking until at breaking point, I call social services to see if I can get some sort of counseling help for the children as they are so unhappy with her behavior - In short no, because I'm there and can do it instead. They do however, join the dots and contact my wife's employer which brings this to head and she moves out taking my children who I tried to get assistance for.
She tells me her boss doesn't believe it, which I believe and they have told social services its all nonsense due to a messy break up and they apparently tell her they thought it was a bit funny as she was a teacher and the dad actually had the children with him while he phoned. The truth was, I phoned from the hall, crying my eyes out and my little star dragged his duvet over followed by his sister and we all sat, cuddled and cried while I was on the phone.
My wife now sees this as some sort of ammunition, along with my "sick" videos of her drunk which she plans to use against me, claiming I should think myself lucky I can still see them at all after my actions, which could result in me only getting supervised contact. She fails to remember all their tears and hurt about mummy being so drunk, she couldn't easily remember their dates of birth when they asked her.
I'd have to say that this is typical of someone not getting their way....bascially a - how dare you try to take away her control over the situation.
what you should do (if not already done it) is....report it to your lawyer....have them contact hers to explain she is in breach of the contact order and that if you do not have contact re-instated you are left with no option but to pursue enforcement of contact order.
Hve you got a hearing date yet for the variation application? if so ask your lawyer to add for enforcement and penalties to be attached to the order, if not and if contact doesn't take place the next time then ask your lawyer to apply for urgent enforcement directions hearing, they can then look at varying the contact order at same time if they will.
Fingers crossed for you KMac
unfortunately some resident parents seem to stop at nothing to destroy their child's view of the non-resident parent by any means possible (trying to be non-sexist there but we all know majority resident parents doing this are mothers)
In my opinion they don't think for one minute about the impact on the kids...they only see it as a way to hurt you and make you suffer for whatever reason they need to make themselves feel better.
this is Parental Alienation but try getting any "expert" to see it....
until there is an order in place with a penalty that the Alienator actually fears then they will not stop.
my ex was told in 2013 that is she continued stopping contact as and when she felt like it then she would face prison (suspended sentence)...had i got the paperwork right that day the judge said he'd have issued her a 3 suspended sentence there and then as it was plain as day what she was trying to do.
that worked for almost 2 years until i tried to get more time with (child) and then she started over again and this time got a weak judge and a thick as pig sh*te gullible CAFCASS case worker who took everything on face value and ignored the 5yrs of previous CAFCASS warnings over my ex.
Keep at it fella...have your lawyer keep the pressure on and don't let too much time go between contact as that weeakens the children's will to go against their mothers word