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hi, this is my very first post so please be gentle with me! were to start.. my sons ex partner had a baby boy 3 months ago and this is the child my son is going to court over, as it stands he hasn,t even met his son yet as the childs mother has prevented this, she obtained a harassment order out on him before the baby was even born so he couldn,t go anywere near, she phones the police constantly if she sees my son walking anywere or if she sees any family members, bearing in mind we all live in a small town, I have since put a complaint to the police as its harassment to my son, it has officially been logged as the inspector felt like she was using the police for her own means and the upcoming court case, my son did have a solicitor but doesn,t get legal aid with the system changing, the childs mother would not attend mediation so it has gone straight to court and he has a date for sept this month, would this go in his favour because she would not attend? she has 2 children to her ex husband who she also took to court over,so she knows the system well, would this go against her? she is a compulsive liar ans seems to get away with it! she also gave the child her ex husbands name even though they are now divorced she kept her married name, will this be harder for my son to get contact as his name isn,t even on the birth certificate? all he ants is an input in his sons life, these women should not be allowed to have children when all they are used for is a weapon, I,ve tried to reason with her and she flatly refuses, and we found out today she has moved a few hundred miles away. how will he stand with that? will she have to attend court were we live were the papers were filed at? I,m sorry theres lots of questions, I feel like we losing every which way we turn, my son is absolutely devastated about it all, its truly heartbreaking...
Hi kazza 🙂
Its outrageous what these women can get away with!
Your son will need to have applied for Parental Responsibility as well as a Contact Order. Unfortunately the harassment order will be enough for her to receive free legal representation, this could have been the reason she has done this.
Because of the harassment this will be the excuse she can use not to attend mediation so it will not go in your sons favour, neither will any previous court appearances to do with her ex husband.
Because your son hasn't been able to form any bond with the child, the court will probably order reports to assess his suitability. If your son does get contact eventually it will very likely be at a contact centre initially, until he and the child have formed a bond. This can be a very slow process.
Unfortunately because your son has no parental rights at the moment there is nothing he can do about her moving so far away. I would think her solicitor will apply to have the case moved to a court near her, as she has children and will find the travelling a problem, this will be the reason she will use to ask for the transfer to a nearer court.
As much as I would love to tell you its all going to work out I cant....he has an uphill struggle. If he gets contact he will have to travel to where his child is living and the likelihood is that it will be supervised at a contact centre. As she has shown she is quite prepared to throw allegations about and so I would expect that there could be more of this.
hi, thanks for your reply, she,s a very cunning girl and knows exactly how to work the system, like you say its gona be an uphill struggle, my son is a lovely lad and is devastated by it all, it breaks my heart to see him like this, how someone can do this to some one is beyond me, incidently her father had nothing to do with her for 20 years and has just recently got back in contact, he has been a massive influence in hr pushing my son away, how very hypocritical! its a classic case of the abused becoming the abuser, we will fight her though, a child needs boths parents, time to get our gloves on and fight right back!
i wish him luck.
i myself am going through exactly the same thing, i have every court order known to man going against me, domestic violence claims the lot.
there is no proof of any of it, its all beyond a joke but the secret court took her statement a gospel truth (its far from truth) personally, i think shes going through the change or worse as her behavior is totally irrational.
shes got legal aid, i have no-one. i cannot even contact my children (at all) my son is 1 yr old, my daughters are 4 and 9. its killing me and i am of work with depression as a result of her behavior and deprivation of the love of my babies.
the real criminals here are the family courts, destroying lives without listening to BOTH sides. is this really a democracy ? or are we guilty at the point of being born a male?
Hi kazza im goin through the same problem i have 2 children to my ex she has got a second injunction order on me even though i never contancted her after the first injunction she lies to police saying i have been harrasing her and has even put 6 speeding tickets in my name while i was on the injunction ive received 12 points in my absence i am appealing against them as she put them in my name bu had them sent bk to her address its a joke how some women can get away with running to the police with faulse allergations and get away with it there are real women with real problems that cant get help and my ex is exploiting the system its so frustrating for me i have my first hearing at court on thursday (26th) i will put a blog on hoping to help other people hope ur son gets the result he wants
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