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Got news yesterday of date for my first hearing next month. Suddenly seems a bit real now!
So question apart from taking in legal corrospondence which I'm using as evidence what else should I take in and what should I expect? I will be self-repping
If you haven’t already read it…..Yoji’s guide to self-representation at the top of the legal section here is very good…explains very well what you need to do and think of.
My memory of my first hearing is a little sketchy….a lot has gone on since back in Dec 2010.
However it shouldn’t last more than 15-30mins….this is basically to hear what you’re wanting from this and what she’s going to allow or refuse.
Unless your ex agrees there and then to reinstate contact or give you what you’re asking for without a fight then it will then be listed for direction hearing at a later date….that’s when you will need all other evidence you may have and may need.
Copies of Letters/emails/text messages…….anything where she has been abusive or you can prove hostile towards you and preventing contact etc…
I would be tempted to have 3 copies of these all ready for the first hearing…and if she or her legal team come out with something you have proof that is a lie or not as they say it is you can always tell the judge you have the evidence to back you up on that with you and offer the judge and her a copy there and then…they may accept it they may not but at least you have it with you if you do need it.
When it is listed for the Directions Hearing you’ll be asked to submit position statements within a set time frame…..again there are very good guides on what to include in that on here…..but start your preparation now.
Just remember that and emails/text messages are usually part of a conversation….don’t just put her messages in hers in because you may have said something that you think will look bad for you…….
i know from mine that my ex at one point tried to claim I’d harassed her by text message…..I was able to prove that she had initiated the text conversation by being abusive and accusing me of cheating on her…..i called her something along the lines of a stupid cow or silly b*tch at the time……..this was 3 months after I left her and she found out I’d been on a night out with friends and was seen at the end of the night talking with a woman…this wasn’t while I was with my ex! I’d been left 3 months!!! [censored]!!!
Anyway my point here is that I included my messages as part of my defence and the judge agreed that it was not harassing because she had been the one who had been instigating and antagonistic towards me…basically trying to cause an argument! Which I used to rise to a lot but have learnt over the years not to as its her way of trying to make me out to be something I’m not!
Now you’re at the court stages you need to be “squeaky clean” in everything you do around this……don’t let yourself get drawn in to arguments or situations where she could potentially claim you’ve harmed her or been abusive towards her……and if you cannot avoid it try to have someone impartial there as a witness should you need to prove yourself.
There are better placed people on this site who can give you better advice on the legal side……I myself feel indebted to so many who have shared their knowledge and in a lot of places helped me vent off steam when I needed to.
Keep up the fight!
Cheers,
The information from the court say's it's a 30min hearing but to be there 30mins in advance of the hearing as there will be a pre-hearing to narrow down the issues. Thankfully I've managed to get it listed in a county court instead of a family one so I can try and make sure she's aware of the options if she fails to provide access etc.
I've not had any corropondance by phone etc for over 4yrs with Ex so she cant say I've been harrasing her and any comunication has always been via legal routes.
The court papers as well as the a copy of all corrospondance between our lawyers which I will be using as been sent out to her as well The papers should have been copied at the court and I take it the judge will already have copies so I don't think I'll need to provide any further copies. I intend to have a phone etc that I'll pass over to the EX so I can use it to contact my child. As well as copies of CRB clearance etc for my partner so they have no use to try stalling tatics
And I do intend to have someone with me incase I'm accused of actions that won't happen.
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