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Hi all, I am new to this site and would really appreciate some help and advice please.
Just to give some background...
I have a 7 year old daughter and her mum and I have been separated for 6 years. Her mum has a partner and has gone on to have 4 other children. I have a partner and have a 1 year old son.
I have always had access to my daughter every weekend and am very much a 'get on with life person' however her mother is a 'make life as difficult as possible person'. There have been a number of occasions where I have wants additional dates to see my daughter and her mother has refused. In 2008 I allowed her mother to take my daughter to Spain for a week holiday and have always allowed her to go on breaks even if they fall on a weekend when I have her. I have always been accommodating in the hope that when I would like to take my daughter on holiday, it will be returned.
I spoke to her mother earlier this week about some dates in August and to my surprise she agreed that I could have my daughter to take on holiday, I called today to speak to my daughter as I do everyday without fail and asked to speak to her mother regarding her passport. As soon as I mentioned it, she said "you are not taking her abroad" until you have had her for a full week in the UK I will not allow you to take her abroad as I won't be able to rescue her"! Obviously my reaction was one of shock and I had to ask her to repeat as I couldn't quite comprehend what she was saying! She went on to say "I have her passport so she won't be going anywhere"!
I have been extremely upset tonight and feel for no reason she is preventing our daughter from having an enjoyable holiday and has no reason to do this. I am a responsible hard working father who has no history of crime, I drink only at Christmas, I have never smoked, taken drugs and provide for my daughter both when she is with me and when she is not, she is, along with my son, my world and her mother is using this emotion against me for her own selfish kicks.
Can any body give me any advice or help,as to where I should go with this please?
Many thanks
Hi there 🙂
There are two options open to you, the first is to try Mediation to sort this out. This is where you would attend an initial appointment and discuss the issues and what you would like to achieve. The Mediator would then write to your ex and invite her to attend to talk about it from her perspective, after which you would both attend and with the help and guidance of the Mediatore hopefully reach an agreement. Here is a link to the National Mediation Service -
www.nfm.org.uk
If this is a non starter, if she refuses or you cant reach agreement you can apply to the court for a Specific Issue Order. You would need to submit the form C100 to your local county court, this will cost £200 unless you are on a low income or in receipt of benefits in which case you would be entitled to a part or full exemption. You would need to apply for this with form EX160a. There are a couple of stickys at the top of the Legal Eagle section about representing yourself in court and also a sticky about filling in the C100 form.
Thanks nannyjane, I have spoken to a solicitor today and have been advised to take out a court order and pay £200 to challenge her decision. The only thing I didn't ask was, if I was to win the case and get the court order can I reclaim that money off my daughters mother? I know in the grand scheme of things it is only £200 but it may prevent her from trying this again for no reason! Many thanks
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