[Solved] I'm in serious trouble, i need help 🙁

Shes also told my dad that she has changed his name to her surname... my surname is on the BC so i didnt believe she could change his name?!

Please guys, help me 🙁

Hi, as far as i know she cant change name without you agreeing.

As for the other sh*t wowsers thats pretty harsh .... i'm sure your not the only person the brother has told about his drug selling etc.. if she is a unfit mother get the social services involved.... they are helping me. When you speak to them stress you worried about the safety of your child ie smoke in house, people in out. more than likely police will go to.
cant really suggest anything else, I know this is a hard time for you and i wish you all the best in seeing/getting your son.

I'm sure other people on here will help 😉
peace out

Thanks Joe, I'm honestly at the point of breakdown mate.

Everyone can see and knows that I am the best option for my son, yet I am told I can't have him or see him as she needs to get on with her life.

She has complete control over me, shes making me depressed, constantly upset, and I feel as though it is now consuming me. On top of all this the borthers are making threats towards me if I go near the house, or even if they see me in the street.

Surely something needs to be done to stop people like this having control over a young lad.

What wll they do? Will they go round and assess the situation etc?

I'm not being a wimp here, I'm just trying to think of how to act without causing her to react out of temper.

I know this is long winded, but im at my wits end and struggling to cope...

Hi mate, your position isn't terribly far off mine (See the topic Help needed urgently)

You need to fight these demons inside you. [censored] yeah it's hard, but FIGHT those demons. YOU need to stay positive and say to yourself that you will solve this for your child!

Go speak to a solicitor, get in touch with a family mediation organization and take their advice. Don't lower yourself to her level, stay positive!!!!!

Hey mate, thanks for that, I'm fighting them everyday but I'm scared that this is a cry for help.

I don't deal with loss very well, I found my best friend hanging in a tree 10 years ago and since all this has happened again I'm getting my nightmares back.

To meet me you would never know that something is wrong, however deep down I'm scared and deeply depressed.

I have reocurring dreams that I'm being chased through a wood by people I cant see, I can just see the torches burning...

God I feel stupid and asthough I should just snap out of it, but this feeling is consuming me.

I keep my head held high and continue to come to work and always wear a smile but shas my son, my little mate and everyday this goes on our bond weakens and a tiny part of me dies.

Out of desperation I had someone call her brother to see how the land lies... basically told him tim to tell me to call him personally as it is none of his business...

This can go either way, however I feel I going to listen to him reitterate what he thinks of me and what he'll do if he sees me etc.
Without telling him that he is being recorded i dont think I can do much.

Do I call the borther and try and sort something out or is this adding fuel to the fire and antagonising him further?

Hi buddy

I feel for you i really do but there is no quiet way to fix this. Whatever your actions they ain't gonna take it lying down. As you say you wanna put your son first so go for it social service, solicitors, police whatever it take to protect him and should the scum react with violence and threats then thats another string to your bow as it can only work against them. If you truly believe him to be in danger its all or nothing,

Sorry to be blunt mate as i say i really don't envy your predicament i just don't think you can deal with people like this on the quiet.

I have contacted the police in regards to the treats, they advised the mother that if this continues they they can both be prosecuted!

... however she is now moving out and away... i know this because she has contacted my friend who is holding the furnishings from the rented property and she knows that she is unable to move without putting them back.. shes moving out without telling me and I have no idea where...

More to the point she is moving somewhere that the police will probably not be able to find her..

Im scared that I will not be able to find him and i will lose him for good 🙁

what are my options? what do i do?
we are supposed to be doing mediation but she has started slanderous accusations of me having a drug problem.. which i do not have!

this woman will not stop untill i am out of his life for good. and im am terrified she will succeed...

Please help me, im lost without him 🙁

I would still go for social services and the police - with any luck, the social services may remove him from your ex and place him with you. If you have serious concerns about your safety and that of your son, let social services know. As for any allegations against you regarding drug abuse, that can easily be discounted with testing.

Im not an expert but would say you need social services to go carry out a welfare check too as soon as you can. Just ring them and have a chat. Then if they thought a welfare check was necessary, they at least would open a file and it would be recorded. Ask for some reassurance that they can be traced at a later date also. The gangsta jerks would be less able to intimidate you the more agencies are invoolved.
Next step would be a court application for a residency order to yourself or a contact order. You can maybe get legal aid even if you work, so go have a few free consultations with any family law solicitors, you get a free 30 minutes or so to asess your situation, they will tell u what ur options are and tell u if you can get legal aid. You dont need a solicitor if you cant get the legal aid. see the first section in the forum" representing yourself"

Go for it mate, stay as focussed as you can, dont mope about, be positive as you can be and the best of luck!!
Dont be worried about your crazy dreams etc. Stress can result in your body doing things that are out of this world.. It will pass with time and positive results.

You can also apply for a prohibited steps order to stop her moving away which is worth looking into as well

Good luck, I hope it all works out. I know from past experience that you can get social services involved, and beyond that the police can also visit to perform safe and well checks - although don't expect too much, without a warrant they are unable to enter the property and if nothing looks untoward at the property/door, then they will simply make sure every one/thing is in okay and go about their business.