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In a court, how doe...
 
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[Solved] In a court, how does this look?


Posts: 355
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Topic starter
(@lifeneedsharmony)
Honorable Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Here are a series of email sent to me by me ex - they are in order in which they sent to me (oldest first)
I have to note that I have not done anything to aggrivate her. All ive asked is to see my boy alone for a little while away from her house.

Here are some emails I get on a daily basis -- All the numbered ones are sent by her to me

1) You can see him on a day soecified by you for a few hours, please think about baby and not yourself.
2) I miss you

At this point I re-innterated that I was seeking legal advice and did not want to talk about anything other than our son.

4) And dont say you are doing this for our baby your doing this for your mum so that she sees him.

5) He isnt your priority so dont pretend otherwise

6) you dont want to see him its ur mum thats behind all this

7) I dont trust you and i know you hate me and hurting me comes naturally to you so do ur worst.
Dont you say ur putting him first because your not, you only want to take him away so your mum can see him.
10) Hes my baby

Actuallly her family almost demamded I sell my caravan to pay of her rent arears from a previous teneancy.
I refused to sell caravan as this was bought and paid for and would make for cheap holidays in the future.

11) I dont need to justify why i dont want my 4 week old son out of my sight, the boy i carried by myself and brought into the world by myself.

Yet she can go out and leave the boy with anyone that will have him,....
all ive ever said is that I dont want to come to their house as it makes me physically sick, so much so that i need to take beta blockers just to go, surely me being of a good mental and relaxed state is better for the baby than someone who is on edge and nervous???

remembering, all ive ever asked that I see him away from their home. I even had an arrangement to have him for three hours, this was cancled last minute three times.

Actually, I forgot to add the emails that show our arrangement and her agreeing to them then changing her mind. (Because we are not a couple)....

Aghhhhhh............ how do you reason with someone who moves the goal posts to make themselves look great!???

7 Replies
7 Replies
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(@oldbutnewdad)
Joined: 12 years ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 100

Jon, you keep hanging in there pal, at least you are in contact with your ex. I have zero, and have had Zero for over a year.

Be guarded in what you say, they will change everything. I havent seen my girl for just short of a year, 20/10/12, try to keep having some contact as believe me you miss so much,

It has been all twisted around and that it is all my fault now, that she changed phone numbers, changed address (4 times in 10months she moved around), that I said we would have to go to court, that I refused mediation, I refused any contact with my daughter, aparently I even refused contact with her after i did parenting classes which were requested by her and i refused contact thro dads club, and also that I am the reason she dosent have any legal aid now.

It is hard to doing the right thing, or as far as I am informed thro my solicitor that I am doing the right thing, that I am not being confrontatenal, that I am being the calm sensible one, but it dosent get me to hold my girl, see her walk and talk.

So keep on going Jon, see your little lad as often as you can but be careful the ex dosent change everything and blame you. I have kept a journal and put loads of stuff in, but more important, the times she was abusive, the times she refused contact, so I have times and dates of all this happening in my angels books.

pete

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(@frustrated_dad)
Joined: 12 years ago

Trusted Member
Posts: 53

i no how you feel buddie. my ex was the exact same, because she was sectioned and i had my son 1 and half hours be4 she came out of recovery and parents seen him b4 she did, shen she came out of hospital she refused to let my parents see my son. we eventually split after this for a few months were i was getting my son over night every weekend. we got back together and moved into a new house, things got worse and now ive anon-mol order out on my for breaking in to MY OWN HOUSE. now its been 13 days i havnt seen my boy. she hasnt even contacted me to tell me how hes doing. my son is also due to walk any day now as i was getting him walking up until the break up ill now not get to see my son take his first steps.
women are vindictive and what goes around will come back around again so sit tight and wait on the karam bus buddie.

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(@lifeneedsharmony)
Joined: 12 years ago

Honorable Member
Posts: 355

Yeah, all bad tho for us all.......... I thank you for your support guys 🙂

I do try and stay positive as much as I can..

You guys should be cool too 🙂 I'm always here if anyone wants to sound off too 🙂

John

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(@dad-i-d)
Joined: 14 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 1306

Firstly you should edit your post as there are too many names and specifics that could be used if she finds out.......Family courts are a "Secret courts" .... they don't take kindly people posting to their cases to the world.

Secondly........if you continue down the court route you can use these emails as evidence to prove the unreasonable side of your ex.

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(@boycieuk)
Joined: 12 years ago

Prominent Member
Posts: 555

Try and do as much through an amicable set up.....if she gives you 3 hours supervised contact take it.

Its all about getting your foot in the door and progressively increasing the time.

submit the mediation form in. I appreciate money was tight so there is some facility for free mediation otherwise I am sure there are some more sensibly priced ones. Either way just get the FM1 form.....

Then make an application......use it as leverage to increasing times and if it meets your needs you may not need to go to court. The key thing here is that set things up early as your little one is young......

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(@BooBoo2010)
Joined: 12 years ago

Estimable Member
Posts: 102

Forget about feelings its what is best for your son. The caravan will provide cheap holidays for you both to enjoy with your son. Try and work out what would be least disruptive for him but providing maximum benefit. Court ain't interested in hurt feelings, put down what you want,the benefits and reasons why. If you put it to them that it is for your sons best interests and show that you are putting his interests first-they will go with it. Always be polite in court, acknowledge the judge, sit when instructed, don't interrupt ot be hostile. Be the model citrizen so to speak and I'm sure you will be fine x

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(@lifeneedsharmony)
Joined: 12 years ago

Honorable Member
Posts: 355

I think I may have had a bot of a breakthrough. Im not sure yet!

(See my other post (yet to be written) All will be explained 🙂

I would just like to say a huge thank you to you all so far for all your help, supoort and advice

John

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