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Hello, Brand new to this site but ive had a look around and it looks fantasic.
Right my daughter was born in april 2010, me and her mum split up when she was a month old. i would have my daughter come and stay at my house overnight a couple of times a week from the moment we split up. i quickly got in a new relationship with sumone that been a friend for a while, this person had been around my daughter already as my friend, if she hadnt i would of introduced them so soon. When my daughters mum found out i had a new gf she was fine at first and when i went to pick my daughter up my ex even walked over put our daughter in my new gf's car and they chatted fine. a couple of weeks later for no apprent reason she demanded i banned my gf from seeing my daughter as apprently she has no need to be in our daughters life. i agreed only because if i didnt she was going to stop my access. In november 2010 she got a new bf and straight away posted pictures of him over facebook holding and cuddling my daughter so through anger i did the same and because of that she only allowed me supervised access at her house every saturday for 4 hours, i agreed to this, even though i cant stand it there and she lives with her mum and all her brothers and sisters, i agreed as she said when she trusts me again things would go back to normal. Her boyfriend used to spend me messages threating to kick my head in, after a month they split up. after months of this supervised access i decided to contact mediation, my ex didnt want to go to mediation so made an agreement with me that i could take my daughter out every saturday but im not to take her around my gf for 3 months. Ive now had another daughter with my new gf too. for my daughters first birthday my ex even invited my gf and they got along fine.my 3 months has just ended and shes told me im only allowed supervised access again. im only allowed to take my new daughter to meet her sister if my ex is supervising and she says my gf(thats i have now been with over a year) will never be allowed around my daughter as shes been told shes dangerous but she cant tell me why shes dangerous and my gf has even offered her a police document of her criminal history. She is now back with her boyfriend from last year, engaged after 2 weeks and allowing him around our daughter. Ive now got back in contact with mediation, my ex is still saying that i will only ever be allowed accesss in a contact centre and that my gf will never ever be around my daughter. if we dont agree at mediation do you any advise on what i might achieve at court ? theres no abuse, violent or criminal record for me or my gf. my gf has a two year old disabeld son and were both very good parents, we now live together in a 3 bed house with my stepson and my new child.any advise would be amazing as i will never give up. Thank you again and sorry for the essay.
Hi devoteddad
Welcome to Dadtalk. Glad you've had a look around and like what you see. I hope we can help you out.
Do go for mediation again, at the moment your ex is calling all the shots and her behaviour is unreasonable over access. Of course you want your new daughter and your eldest to bond being half-sisters which cannot really happen properly if you are only granted access at your ex's crowded house or in a contact centre.
I suggest you get in touch with the Childrens Legal Centre (080888 020 008) for their advice about going to court over access but do try mediation first. It is less costly and will go in your favour in court, should it get to that, if you have been seen to try this.
Hi
Good advice there i would say, but in addition don't stand still...prepare yourself for court just in case so....
1. Make sure you have an audit trail of all communications
2. Read up about contact orders, residency orders etc
3. Look at the forms that you need to fill out
4. See advice from the court clerks as to what you need to do
5. Look at the Child Welfare Check List
...and ask yourself this everytime you do or write something "is this in the best interests of my child?" if not don't do it...
...if you do all this and you need to go to court, you may not have to pay thousands to a solicitor..i did this, paid £175 and won -twice vs a solicitor that costed her thousands...made me smile !
Richard
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