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Hi
I currently have my nine yr old twins every other w.end (fri to mon am), and every Wednesday 3-30-7-00pm.i am seeking additional access of overnight stays on Wednesday's and every other Monday, overnight,following the weekend they don't stay with me .
This is my short term goal- I have informed cafcass that this is just a 'stepping stone' as I'm looking to gain joint custody.my kids want this,I live nearby, and work flexible hours so can take kids to, and from school, hobbies etc.
My ex is totally against this, and has accused me of all sorts.
Cafcass are, inte next few weeks, going to visit my children for wishes and feelings to be taken into account. I am due back in court in November, where I think a decision will be made.
I'm starting to get very nervous as my children mean so much to me, please can you give me advice on how to prepare for courts, anything I can say to the court/cafcass that will support my case.
I have just had shared summer holidays with my children and now find it very painful when they are not with me, all I want is for a more balanced view on how much I see them. My kids are in tears every time they leave me.
Lastly, I have been separated 18mths, mediation never worked,and have now been going through the court process since march, this will be my third hearing.
All advice is VERY very appreciated.
It's been a long time since I dealt with cafcass, but the advice I would give is that you write down beforehand a list of all points you wish to make, so you are then sure you haven't missed anything, and be totally honest about everything, and be positive about everything you want to say, don't be negative about your ex, though if there is evidence of anything you feel that they don't have, by all means have that to hand.
I have had my kids this evening, when they were dropped to their mums on Monday am, my little boy was crying and then both my kids started saying to their mum they missed me, my ex's response was to shout at them which is making them frightened. How do I get this point across to cafcass/courts without looking like I just want to be negative about ex.
I'm really starting to get concerned about my twins emotionally.
You can certainly relate incidents like this - when I said not to be negative, what I meant was don't spend your time with cafcass slagging off your ex at the expense of getting across the positives of the children being with, or having more contact with you. Also try to make sure that cafcass interview the children - at 9 years old they should certainly be able to give a picture of how they feel - the interview with them will be away from the mother, and cafcass should explain to the children what will and will not get back to the mother.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
