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hey there,
i have an on going issue that ive had for 6 months now, and im just wondering what are my rights with the issue.
I last saw my child on October 19th 2011....and not hearda word from his mother since 3rd December 2011, and it now being 27thMarch. im getting a little impatient and frustrated with the lact of access. what makes it worse is the fact the mother isnt getting in touch with me or anything to let me know when i can see him or let me know how hes getting on.
i would ofcourse call her, if i had her number, and i would ofcourse go see her and my son...if i knew where they moved to. I dont want to go down the whole Legal route, but im feeling im left now with no choice.
so need advice, what are my rights as a father who is paying CSA
Hi Alex,
Welcome to the site! I'm very sorry to hear about your troubles, but you're amongst friends here! We've all been through it!
How old is your child? Does your name appear on your son's birth certificate? If the answer to the latter is yes, then you you have Parental Responsibility (PR) and have various rights to consultation regarding your daughter's religion, education etc.
Unfortunately PR doesn't extend to contact. UK Law determines that this is the right of the child, rather than the parent. Contact is usually controlled by the resident parent (your ex) and if this is being reduced or withheld the non-resident parent (you) will have to apply to the courts for a contact order.
The courts usually expect you to have attempted mediation before making an application. Have you tried this? If not, write to your ex and suggest it. Keep a record so that you can prove you've made an attempt should you have to make a court application. In some instances instructing a mediation service can be enough to let your ex know that you're serious and they can often relent and become more complaint.
Hopefully your ex will see sense, but this may not be the case and you should prepare yourself for a long battle. These things can take time.
If you write to her regarding mediation or restoring contact, ask her to respond within 14 days. Tell her that if you don't hear from her, she will leave you with no other choice other than to make an application to the court.
Let us know how you get on. If she fails to respond come back to us and we'll talk you through your options..
FM '70
Hi Alex
FM has covered a lot of ground in his post above - however, if you don't know where your ex is currently, take a look at this post to see if it helps:
Let us know how you go on, and post back here if you have any questions.
Thanks ACTD. I neglected to mention that fairly important bit of info... apologies Alex!
Many thanks guys for replying and giving me fantastic advice.
i shall get the wheels in motion and return with results of whats happening/happened. . .fingers crossed i will return with good news.
my son is 16months so ive already missed out on the major milestones. . .and my name is on the birth certificate and he has my last name.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
