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Whilst I await feedback on the last update, I was wondering if you can assist,
If and when we get to the final hearing I will need a position state,net.
Currently my ex is still very much against me setting up ANY CONTACT with my child whom I have never seen, who has never witnessed any violence between us.
What I would like to now say is that I believe the mother is clearly demonstrating implacable hostility, and perhaps this comes from a maternal instinct and that she is fearful that she may loose control of the child, or that the child will become attached to me.
That she has a total lack of insight into how her behaviour is damaging for the chold and goes against the chold best interest whic is also against the convention of rights of the child to have personal relationships with both parents.
That all I want and have ever wanted is to have a relationship with my child, regardless of our separation all that mattered to me was my child. I have not been any threat to her perceived or otherwise since 2008. CAFCASS Have confirmed I have not been known to the police and therefore there is no evidence to show a risk to the child, I live with my new wife and her son so again I clearly have ,over on.
I am being amicable and trying to resolve without legislation as I have on many occasions during these hearings tried to negotiate however she still refuses.
I have even requested that when it becomes unsupervised that the handover is always done at a contact centre aswell, mainly because I don't trust her not to make further false allegations.
That although the courts found it proved of that DV occurred on occasion, there is no police findings or medical reports to cooperate this and cafcass who are independant couldnt find evidence that I am a risk to Joshua.
I am fearful though of being accused of slagging her off, however up till now have never said a bad word really against her.
Do you think this would be ok to now say at this tags, especially in light that she has had a fact finding hearing in her favour and a cafcass report saying to start contact slowly.
There are ways of saying positive things you have done which strongly imply that you have done this because of negative things she has done, without actually saying what you have done. That's always the best way if possible, eg "I have repeatedly, though unsucessfully, tried to maintain contact..." is positive in your actions but makes it clear that you have been prevented.
Would you say then that I shouldnt say about her being hostile?
I just feel its about time I made my feelings clear, that in spite of a fact finding and cafcass report saying im no risk to joshua, that she still refuses me contact
that she is being unreasonable and hostile . . .
Would you be able to assist me with writing this, or is there anywhere I can get assistance for this part
I would say that you need to stress what you are doing positive over what your ex is doing that's negative - you can certainly mention what difficulties you are having, but what you don't want to do is to get into a mud slinging match as that won't go down well in court. You can also state facts.
It may be worth having a word with the CCLC on their webchat facility.
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