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[Solved] Preparing for Mediation


Posts: 1020
Registered
Topic starter
(@daver)
Noble Member
Joined: 12 years ago

Hi all,

I have a mediation appointment on the 9th May.

I took my ex partner to court last week and was granted access to the children 1 evening a week and every other weekend until the next court date which is 31st May.

At mediation I expect it to be mostly financial as the residency matter is ongoing and will be heard on the 31st May.

What can I do to prepare for mediation and do you have any advice or guidance in terms of how to prepare and how mediation is conducted?

Is it very formal, do I have to be mindful of my every word or action?

Id like to go in and just set my position but dont wish to come across as combatative or unfair, I just want what is best for the children.

Regards,

Dave

4 Replies
4 Replies
 actd
Registered
(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11892

As I understand it (not been through it myself), mediation is quite informal, and as long as what you are asking is reasonable, then you aren't going to come across as combatative. It's worth having a position of what you would really like to happen, and a position of the absolute minimum you would accept - go in asking for the first, and if necessary give a little, so long as you don't go below your minimum, that way it shows you are prepared to be reasonable.

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Registered
(@daver)
Joined: 12 years ago

Noble Member
Posts: 1020

Thanks actd...attending next week and have a few options in mind including a minimum.

Sounds like buying a car. ;-/

Regards,

Dave

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Registered
(@got-the-tshirt)
Joined: 12 years ago

Famed Member
Posts: 2917

Hi Dave,

I have been through mediation and as actd says it is pretty informal, you will go into the room the mediator will ask you what you would like to achieve (best case) and then the same of your ex, from that point you will see how far apart you are between an agreement.

the best way to go in is with a very open mind, keep your minimum in your mind but don't get too caught up in that as the more you argue about the money the more money it will cost you, I spent ages arguing over money and I wish I could go back and do it again as I wouldn't have held out and dug my heels in so far, the result of holding out for a certain amount meant that I had to spend more on solicitors.

Bear in mind that solicitors fees get big quickly if you have to use them, every phone call you make to them, every call they make, every letter they read or wright will cost you.

If you can reach an agreement in mediation then you won't need to use a solicitor and will save more of the money you are aiming to get.

GTTS

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 ak57
Registered
(@ak57)
Joined: 13 years ago

Prominent Member
Posts: 623

Hi , great news with regards contact. I have been through mediation a few years ago and my son very recently. They will guide you and your ex and in our cases were very fair. Type it all out a in clear order what you would like to discuss and what you expect, at the first meeting the mediator will listen to you , then do a separate one with your ex so they can get a clear picture of what you both want then they will try and reach a common ground so you both agree

agree

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