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4 children aged 4, 6 , 9 and 10
Currently am getting some contact with the children but all on ex partners terms ( wont be seeing 2 of the children for 21 days which to me is so unacceptable and unfair)
For a number of reasons primarily that the children get quality time with me I have requested two children to stay with me at weekends and in mid week, taking the two older ones one week followed by the two younger ones the following week. I have been doing this on off for the last two months and it has worked well. I took the two oldest to the cinema and on the way the home they said that was great and said we couldn't of done that if their younger siblings where with us.
She now says I must have all 4 children or none
She has refused mid week contact says they have activities after school but they do not and I have chosen a day in the week when they do not.
Mediation has failed and the solicitor has complete c100 form
My question is and am really worried but is my request to take 2 children at a time and mid week contact reasonable ? I am thinking we could review this in 6 / 12 months.
Cheers
To be honest you will have to have a plausible explanation as to why you cannot manage four in one go. Courts do not like to separate children. If it is an issue of quality of time with the children then there maybe an option. Otherwise could there other mitigating factors like she has a new partner which has triggered this, and she is doing this not in the childrens best interest? What did your solicitor think. Maybe worth enquiring with CAFCAS if they have some open session as to what might be right and appropriate. Just keep presenting options and keep correspondence. Doesnt sound like she is gonna budge.
Good luck
We lived in a semi rural environment and she has a friend living with her now and has support from friends and family. I do not
The 6 year old is highly spirited and I get totally stressed looking after all 4. Finding stuff that they all want todo is hard because of their ages.
The solicitor hasn't really said too much just noted my request to have 2 at a time
Cheers
To be honest having all 4 is making me ill and I would seriously have to consider walking away for a while and not having contact with them. That decision would not be taken lightly and would break my heart but I'm struggling with all 4 at the same time especially as one is the devil child !
Cheers
Have you thought about trying someone like Relate? It might be worth a try. Hers a link - www.relate.org
Usually as boycie has said courts are loathe to split siblings but that could be more in relation to Residence rather than contact....it's a tough call. As you have worked out a system of having 2 at a time and its working, you could argue that you see all of the children the same amount of time but are able to have quality time with them when you have split contact in this way. Perhaps to mitigate it you could ask that you have them altogether once a month say, so that you can do whole family stuff together.
If you can show that the system of 2 on 2 has worked over a period of time and that the mother had been happy for it to be that way and more importantly the children had been happier with it then you might stand a chance....there's no way of knowing and it's hugely dependent on the judge on the day.
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