Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: Important Information – open to read:
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
I have a contact order that has been in place since last September and all has been ok up until this weekend. I picked up my child who is 6 this morning as normal and he seemed very tired and not himself, he then told me his mummy is in Spain for 5 days and his sister who is 21 (not my daughter)is looking after him. My ex has not told me anything about this and I have no clue when she is back in the country.
I'm assuming my child is tired as his routine is now all over the place and he was trying to fall asleep at 3pm today. The question I have is I have a contact order which states the mother is to pick up the child from me after every visit, this is not going to happen tomorrow as she is out of the country, I also have fears that my child will be tired for school on Monday if his sister is looking after him and i don't know who else is looking after him?
My ex has residency of our child and thinks she has the right to walk all over me and do as she pleases, she has broken so many of the court order rules over the past few months but i have just let them go rather than rock the boat, but i'm getting to the point when i need to do something.
Would you do anything or just let it go?? She is a very volatile person who has an evil streak and will no doubt try and get her revenge if I dared to question how she was bringing up our child who she has residency of.
Hi David and welcome.
To be honest, I can't see that a court would be too impressed if you tried to do anything about the fact that your ex's daughter collected your son rather than his mother - realistically, what would you expect to achieve. Your ex has made arrangements which are adequate under the circumstances, so I don't think it's worth making anything of this.
However, if you ex is in the habit of breaking the contact order regularly, then I would keep a diary and consider enforcement for those breaches.
Perhaps if you write her a letter. You don't have to question her abilities just ask that she adheres to what is written within the contact order. You could ask that in the future she discusses childcare with you if she intends to leave your son, and mention his tiredness at the contact visit. Maybe offer to have him next time. 🙂
Welcome to the DAD.info forum.
We don’t like to set ‘rules’, but to make sure that you and the other dads are kept safe, we have some requests. When engaging with the forum, please be aware of the following:
- The forum is not moderated 24 hours per day.
- Many of the moderators do so on a voluntary basis. Whilst they may be able to provide some guidance, advice or support, they may not be able to deal with specifics.
- We are not an emergency crisis service so if you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call emergency services.
- If you are concerned about the safety of a child, please click here to find the support you can get for them (link to new page)
- If you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123. They are open 24 hours a day, 7 days per week.
We hope you find this forum a supportive environment and thank you for joining us.