Welcome to the DAD.Info forum: We are not open to new posts at this time
Our forum aims to provide support and guidance where it can, however we may not always have the answer. The forum is not moderated 24 hours a day, so If you – or someone you know – are being harmed or in immediate danger of being harmed, call the police on 999.
Alternatively, if you are in crisis, please call Samaritans on 116 123.
If you are worried about you or someone you know is at risk of harm, please click here: How we can help
Hi,
I am looking for some advice please. I have a 4 year old son who currently lives with my wife. We separated 2 years ago but we are still married. Things have not been amicable between us to say the least. I signed over all my rights to the house when I moved out and started off again on my own renting.
About a year ago I met my current partner who has two children and we moved in together. Since then things have been difficult. I don't have a great track record which doesn't help. I'm not up to date with my child maintenance as I have been in and out of work however I have bought clothes and toys for my son which i have dropped off at the house. The main thing being held against me is I smoke Cannabis which I am waiting to go into a clinic to come off of it. I realise how this has affected my life in a negative way and I want to change that. Also prior to me meeting my current partner my wife and I had a row where she assaulted me and I reported it to the police. However I was counter charged and found guilty of assault enen though I swear I did not lift a finger and I was the one with the bruises! So to top it all I have a criminal record. Since then I had been seeing my son regularly every other weekend and it was all going well when suddenly the rug has been pulled from under my feet.
Basically my wife is saying I can no longer have access to my son ( I haven't seen him since June ) until I have totally stopped. I never smoke around him and I love being with him.
I want to go to court but I cannot afford the costs and I just don't know what to do. I don't want my son to grow up thinking that I am not interested in him or that I don't love him. What can I do??
Hi Brian
Thank you for being honest about your situation, that does help to get the best advice.
I would recommend that you read yoji's guides to representing yourself at the top of the legal section, as they are a good starting point. I would also check whether you are eligible for legal assistance.
Realistically, in your position, I would acknowledge to the court that you have a problem and that your ex does have legitimate concerns, and to that end, you think that it would be appropriate to have supervise contact at a contact centre (which your ex should have less chance at arguing against) until, say, 6 months have passed after treatment has finished, at which point supported contact could be appropriate.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
