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My ex cheated on me and weeks later left with our two adorable children (then 6 months and 2 years old).
Now almost 5 and 3 years old I'm still having trouble with her with regard to access.
We came to the arrangement that I would have them every Sunday as well as every other Saturday for a sleep over. This has been working nicely, but The band I manage has started to take off a bit and there s a weekend approaching where I'll be away with them. She says as usual that if I don't have the children I can't see them anymore!
Advice?
She has often used me seeing them as a way of controlling me. This doesn't happen often, but she realistically expects that I will never be away for a weekend. Is she mad or am I?
Hi Moker,
This sounds like a hard situation you find yourself in. Is the agreement you've made through the courts/solicitors or just an agreement between yourselves? For more advice on where you legally stand I suggest you contact The Children's Legal Centre (there is a link to their site, towards the top, right hand side of this page). I would expect that you should be able to change the times you see your kids, when you go away.
My two youngest kids are 5 & 3 yrs old. They are so much fun at this age, don't you think? Hope you are able to sort the arrangements out & let us know how you get on.
Springchicken
Hi Moker
It's unrealistic for your ex to expect you to keep to rigid routines all of the time, there should be a degree of flexibility although it is vital to keep up contact where possible. It sounds as if you have been a great dad to your kids, despite the setbacks.
I hope you will be able to reach an amicable agreement over that particular weekend and anything that crops up in the future, without the need for court action. Mediation may be one way of sorting things out between you.
I agree that mediation is the way forward, but assuming you sort this out in advance, make sure your children know in advance that you will be missing a week because of work, and say you'll do something special with them the week before, or the week after.
Yeah perhaps a compromise is needed (unless you've already tried it?). Offer to watch them a couple of other days if that's possibly for you, show that your willing to be flexible and hopefully it would stand in your favour if it had to go to court?
Hope you get it sorted mate
Frank
Yeah perhaps a compromise is needed (unless you've already tried it?). Offer to watch them a couple of other days if that's possibly for you, show that your willing to be flexible and hopefully it would stand in your favour if it had to go to court?
Hope you get it sorted mate
Frank
sounds like good advice
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