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Hi guys,
its been three weeks now since my day in court, every thing is in place to the point i should be getting my decri absolute by the end of the month, there lies the problem.
having had to deal with the divorce i did not want and for it to be finalised so quickly ie 8 months start to finish, i am now struggling to come to terms with it all. i still have feelings for my wife although she is out and about getting on with things (and still spending money) i on the other hand am finding it hard to be positive. when i have the children it is great be it a bit stressfull with 4 under 8yrs.
i am having all the feelings of anger, jealousy, frustration as well as pity at times.
any ideas how i can cope with these feelings so that i can move on
cheers
Hi
I'm sorry to hear that you are going through a tough time coming to terms with your divorce. You and your wife were together a long time and losing a love like this is similar to a bereavement, you have to give yourself time to grief for the loss of this relationship, the shared dreams and commitments.
Recognise that it's OK to have different feelings. It's normal to feel sad, angry, exhausted and confused and these feelings can be intense. Accept that reactions like these will lessen over time.
Don't go through it all alone. Share your feelings with friends and family if you can to help you get through this period. Isolating yourself can raise your stress levels, reduce your concentration and get in the way of your work, relationships and overall health. Don't be afraid to get outside help if you need it.
You may be interested to know that Relate offer courses for people going through divorce. Click on http://www.relate.org.uk/workshop-moving-forward/index.html for more information.
I hope this helps you.
I don't mean this to sound flippant, but you need to get out. It sounds like you aren't necessarily ready yet to go out dating, but go and try something new, or if possible, something you've always said you'd do, but haven't yet done. Basically, you need to find a life away from your ex.
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
