[Solved] Struggling to meet standards
Ok my partner is pregnant 13 weeks
Guys I'm struggling with things we seem to have come disconnected from each other and like when she dosnt feel to good I personally find it hard to comfort her .
I know how I should be but I cant comit to it , its putting a lot of pressure on our relationship as she turned around to me and says I dont understand I am never interested she says she worries when the baby is here that I will not be able to cope with the baby and she dosnt trust me with it .
I'm at a very loose and as I love this woman but we are just not getting on
must be pregnancy hormones, if you noticed a change in behaviour all of a sudden. perhaps she needs re-assurance. sit by her side. maybe get her family to talk to her about these issues. how long have you been together?
Hello G.m.l., Speaking from personal experience, when I was pregnant with my son, it felt such a shock, even though he was expected. I didn't know how I was going to cope, or if I'd still be a good wife, friend as well as a mum. Sometimes the realisation of becoming a parent can be an overbearing feeling, for both mum and dad to be. Your partner is experiencing changes in her body that she has very little control over, and many of these things you won't be able to do anything about.
Keeping communication open between the both of you is essential, so that it helps your partner to feel reassured, safe and secure. This is your time to show your partner how much you care for her in a very practical way. Find ways to show her you love her and appreciate her. For example do something around the home that takes energy like vacuuming, cleaning the bathroom. Buy her some flowers, a little teddy for your new baby. Be brave and share with her that you sometimes feel frustrated because you don't know how to best help her. And like Bill337 says, perhaps encourage her to share her anxieties with a trusted family member or friend. The same for you too - dads are important and need to look after themselves mentally, so they can be there for their partners throughout these months ahead. You are both going to be parents, and I can testify whilst it's sometimes a challenge it's the most rewarding role you can have. Wishing you all the very best,
Fegans Parent Support Volunteer.