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If you read the link I provided, or research gillick competence you will see that children over 12 do have the right to refuse medical information about them being shared, even with their parents.
If your daughter herself were to state that she didn’t want her medical information shared with you, unless there was a really good reason for that not to happen, they would be likely to consider her competent enough to make that decision... at least that’s my understanding of it.
Perhaps your daughter doesn’t have an enduring medical condition with a team of medical professionals, so the issue of gillick competence isn’t an issue. As the OPs son is disabled, his team may have discussed this with him, or as the OP suspects, the mother has something to do with it... but that would be difficult to prove.
Yes, she would class as special needs, but not an enduring medical condition.
So my experience may not be fully relevant but seems so in parts, so thought to put in the mix.....
Absolutely! You always give good advice HR.
Bluemoon61...
I think if your son is judged competent enough to make that decision he is also mature enough to discuss his decision with you... I totally understand why you would much rather keep him out of the loop, but if, after talking to his medical team, you’re no further forward, I don’t see you have any other option. If you have a good relationship with him, it’s reasonable to want to talk to him about it.
Best of luck
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