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hi can anyone please help or advise me in my situation. 5 days ago i took my oldest son home to his mother. i was away from the family home for 2 hours, on return my partner of 6 years and our 4 year old son had gone along with most of the house contents. everything of hers and our sons has been removed along with many of my things. materials not important, she and son are. i dont know where they are, how they are, impossible to contact mobile phone off. possible she is with sister but no reply from her, no phone and no responce from knocking on door. also put letters through sisters letter box, still nothing. i have called childrens legal advisors and simply told she has done nothing illegal but it wont reflect well on her should i pursue the matter through the courts. QUESTIONS, is there anything i can do to get to see my son soonest. will anyone help to trace her and our son. do i have any legal rights at all to bring him back to the family home. Yes my name is on his birth certificate but we are not married, please help i,m desperate
Sorry Jules we seem to have totally missed your post.
I will pass this on to our legal partners the Children's Legal Centre so they can respond
Cheers
Gooner
Dear Jules,
We apologise for the delay in responding to your query.
As you have already been advised, the mother has done nothing illegal, as either parent is able to leave and take the child with them at any time when they both have parental responsibility.
At present, if you are unsure of where they are it is very difficult for you to do anything, however some solicitors do have the ability to appoint a person to attempt to locate her and serve certain papers on her, although they may not reveal the address to you. Also, if you made an application to court, they are able to attempt to locate the mother and child.
The issue with contact is that the person who establishes themselves as the resident parent can make all decisions regarding contact until your son is old enough to do this for himself (this may be from approximately a teenager depending on maturity, but absolutely at 16 years old) or until a court order is put into place for contact.
If you are not able to speak with the mother and she will not respond to you regarding contact that you have with your son or attend mediation with you, then it may be that the only option you have to gain contact will be to make an application to court for a contact order.
Should the mother agree contact with you, then she is able to make this supervised or restricted while there is no court order in place if she wishes, even if there is no reason for this.
If you are given unsupervised contact before any court orders are made, then you are able to take the child back to your home, however the mother is able to remove him again and this can end up in a ‘tug of war’ type situation and obviously detrimental to your son.
As your name is on your son’s birth certificate, you have a right to an input in the important decisions affecting his life, and the mother will not be able to remove him abroad for more than four weeks or change his surname without your consent. You do not have a right to see your son, as the right to contact belongs to the child, not parents.
You are able to apply to the court at any time for contact or residence, whichever you prefer, and the court will make their decisions on this based on what they believe to be in the best interests of your son.
If the mother refuses you all contact then it may be very difficult to have contact before the matter goes to court, but you are able to request interim contact at the first hearing and the court are able to grant this whilst the proceedings are being heard.
We hope that this information is useful to you. Should you still require advice please contact the Child Law Advice Line on 0808 8020 008 and an advisor will be happy to help you.
Kind Regards
Children’s Legal Centre
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