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Been a couple of weeks since my court date (3rd Feb) haven’t found time to give an update but here it is now.
All went as well as I’d hoped it would but not as good as it could’ve been….
The judge ordered contact to resume and it’s in place for a 3 stages that we (me and the ex) have finally talked and agreed like civil adults for once!
3 stages just because of the length of time its been since my little boy & I have spent meaningful time together….not what I’d want but it has to be this way says the judge.
Stage 1 – spread over 8 weeks 3hrs at a contact centre weekly/ 3 sats out of 4.
Stage 2 – spread over 8 weeks 4hrs away from the contact centre weekly/ 3 sats out of 4. Just using the contact centre as a drop off and pick up point.
Stage 3 – all day (9:30-4pm) weekly alternate Saturday’s and Sunday’s
Review back at court week of 14th May to see how its going and for further instruction over full contact to be ordered.
Hopefully this would be weekends and overnight stays but I’m not sure my ex will allow that as she’s not happy with our son being away from her anyway (Her separation issues!).
Finally spoke with the contact centre today after a week of leaving messages and emails, I’m going in to see them on Saturday just to satisfy my own curiosity about what facilities they have and get an idea of if its nice enough so that the ex doesn’t put her nose up n be snobby about the place. If its in a rough area or looks a bit old n run down she’ll play [censored] up I know what shes like! (A proper snooty up herself woman! Who forgets where she was brought up in the rough area of town!!)
A wannabe two-bob-millionaire (all show no dough) - as my father would say it!
Anyway Contact starts 3rd March a month after the Contact order was given. I do get frustrated with how slow things progress but the end result will be worth it…..i’ll get to see my little boy again and re-build our once great father son relationship.
To all the dads here in the middle or just starting out in the fight….Don’t give up hope….these things drag out depending on how bad your ex can be….but your kids are what you’re doing this for….never give up never surrender…..Your kids need you in their lives.
Good luck to all and I’ll update as and when I can.
Big thanks to all the guys here who’ve given me support and advice to carry on fighting…..without you guys and my son I wouldn’t be here today…Thank you.
That is great news mate - overjoyed for you and the kids.
Can't wait to read your updates after you get to spend some time with the kids.
That's a fantastic result - in theory in 16 weeks you could be having all day contact once a week and staying contact not long after that. Brilliant result.
My local contact centre isn't the prettiest place - it's in a baptist church hall, but the staff are well trained and my daughter has a good time and feels safe there. If your ex kicks up a fuss, then I don't think the judge would be at all happy so she wouldn't do herself any favours.
Well I met with the Contact Centre volunteers on Saturday just to satisfy my curiosity of what the place and people were like.
i have to say that i've a feeling the ex won't like it as its a big old chuch hall, not very exciting for a 4yr old boy i guess but i'll make it enjoyable for him somehow.
The people are really nice and seem genuine so i'm at ease about that, they have reassured me that they will be pulling the ex up if she steps out of line with what they term reasonable behaviour by her in front of my little boy, but she wasn't suppoed to be doing the handovers, her new hubby is...but she'll have to attend the first to do their pre-contact prep.
So....from the 3rd march i will get 3hrs a week for the first 3 saturdays of each month. so 8-9 weeks time i should be near taking him out for 4hrs away from the centre.....then 8 weeks after that provided the ex hasn't kicked off again me and my little boy should be away from contact centres all together. i best not get my hopes up too much on that....i know my ex lost in court but she'll still cause problems i'm sure of it. but hey you never know...she may just get used to the idea of having time without my little boy around her during the day....i bet her new hubby will prefer that!! lol
anyways......i'll keep updating as and when i have something worth sharing.
keep strong guys
Really pleased for you. It sounds like if you do things by the book (and she doesn't) things wil get better and better for you. Hope the contacts go well!
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