[Solved] confused

Hi

You are either going to need a solicitor or to contact someone like the Citizens Advice Bureau regarding the DV, though hopefully some other dads who have been through the same will give some advice. I would have a read of yoji's "guilde to representing yourelf" at the top of the legal eagle section to give you some idea of the legal process.

If you have any further questions, post them in the legal eagle section and we'll try to help.

It seems these days that making wild accusations of domestic violence is believed to get you some clout in court.

I hope it doesn't work

the more and more i read....the more and more i believe that someone is advising the mothers out there to suggest DV as their first way to halt you from either getting more contact with your kids or just a way to make you suffer.

either way this is a relaity.......as soon as they claim DV you're then in an up hill battle to disprove it.....you're male...she's a "poor defenseless little mum...stuck at home all day being abused by you!!"

Really....am i wrong??? yes there are ex's out there absolutely valid about DV....but there seems to be an awefull lot making this up as the only way of making the father of their kids do what they want them to do..........its a control thing!

as soon as they claim DV they have regained control over you until they are found to be liars!

Hi so sorry you are going through this. Due to legal aid stopping in April and the only way of getting it is to cry DV then I expect we will be seeing more an more.
I would write to her solicitor and clearly state you have not done what she is acusing you of and the very fact she as been in the house to collect things, where you there when she came the first time did you say anything to her.Ask him when can you see your children. At the moment do not contact her directly or go near her as it will make things worse. You could try mediation as the court are now really pushing for this.

Hi chriskids,

Really sorry to hear that you find yourself in this situation. You really need to get yourself some legal representation I'm afraid.

I will echo the advice that others have given - do not try to contact your ex directly or go near her. At the moment It will could do more harm than good.

You need to start logging things - make a note of the dates and times of when she came round to collect her stuff and what happened and keep copies of all correspondence (even text messages and emails). You never know what will help you over the coming months.

One thing to remember is, we're here - even if all you need to rant or vent.

Good luck and keep talking.

Gooner

the more and more i read....the more and more i believe that someone is advising the mothers out there to suggest DV as their first way to halt you from either getting more contact with your kids or just a way to make you suffer.

either way this is a relaity.......as soon as they claim DV you're then in an up hill battle to disprove it.....you're male...she's a "poor defenseless little mum...stuck at home all day being abused by you!!"

Really....am i wrong??? yes there are ex's out there absolutely valid about DV....but there seems to be an awefull lot making this up as the only way of making the father of their kids do what they want them to do..........its a control thing!

as soon as they claim DV they have regained control over you until they are found to be liars!

Actually, on a separate issue, you make a good point here d-i-d - those who make unfounded accusations are really messing up the legal system for those very genuine cases of DV