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hello to all,presume all on here have had the pain that i am about to endure me and my girlfriend have decided to call it a day,after a 12 year relationship.problem is we have a 10 year old daughter who is my world and i dont know were to begin on how to tell her i am leaving any help please....
Hi there and welcome to Dadtalk
There are many people here who have experienced what you are going through.
I would say you need to be honest with your daughter - try not to blame your girlfriend - and make sure she knows that it is not her fault.
You need to spend some time with her and it may be best to try to both sit down with her (I suppose that depends how amicable the split is)
I am sure others will comment but she needs to be confident that you still want to see her - kids are resilient but this will knock her sideways
Good luck and please let us know how you get on
Yep sm is right,
It will be tough on her and she may be knocked back a bit but at 10 im sure she would have some idea that things weren't great, so just explain that as things have gotten worse it is better for you to not live together anymore, what this will mean for her is that she will have 2 places that will be home and 2 rooms to decorate, make as much time for her as you can, but don't forget time for yourself you are going through this as well and no matter how bad things have been and even if you have expected it, it will knock you too.
Darren
hi everyone thanks for the help ,
my partner [ex] lowered herself to her nomal standard and told my daughter while i was at work even though we said we would tell her together.got home to pick up the pieces took her away over weekend she is set on living with me i know its early days but what woul be my chances of custody anyone know.would her feelings be took into acount?
What are the arrangements that your ex is planning for your daughter?
It's possible that you could get a residence order, unfortunately the odds are still stacked against you but it has been done. Is there any chance your ex would agree as that would be the easiest solution, though I suspect I already know the answer to this. At 10 years old, the court would probably ask Cafcass so speak to your daughter, and she is getting to the age where a court will take her views into account, but it's not guaranteed. I would say that you need to sort it out as soon as possible - if your ex has your daughter for any length of time when you are not living there, then a court would be more reluctant to change the arrangements.
Hi
Actd is right if your 10 year old stays with your ex for any length of time it will be a lot harder for you to get a residence order.I would if you can speak to a solicitor although my experiance of them has not left a lot to be desired but you do need to know where you stand ASAP. We have all been through this at some point and want what is best for our children but as Darren said make time for yourself, no matter how resiliante you are there will be times when it get's tough.Good Luck
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