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[Solved] Hello..Heres my story.


Posts: 2
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Topic starter
(@nevertoolate)
New Member
Joined: 13 years ago

Hi, Im 5o years old, had been married for 28 years, have 5 children, one at home aged 10. Divorced last Sept. My now x went off for some space, booked herself in a refuge, made up a load of lies about controlling, which later came to light she found on the internet, she came home for good 3 times and then went back, came home to me every weekend but told the refuge she was staying at our daughters, let me pick her up and drop her off outside the refuge and even move her out from there in the middle of the night, this place is a sanctuary for abused women, im not meant to know where it is, she didnt care, just used them, i do need to say that there are women who really do need these places.We live in an old house, she has been back just over a year, the divorce went through as it normally does, i didnt contest it, whats the point. We lived to gether here, i started doing up the house as she said she wanted it, but behind my back was liasing with the council to get a house of her own, next thing i know she has got a brand new house just up the road. She has ended the tenancy which was joint, i have 3 weeks to find a home for me and my dog. Told the whole village im an abuser, second time she has done this, moved from the last one thank God, but here i am again. My children cant belive what shes done, she s unstable, i really think her child abuse hasnt been dealt with, she says it has but we all think different. Im known as a sensitive guy, really have done all i can, she says im a controller, everyone around me including professional help that i have had totally disagree. I have lost everything on false grounds, what sort of world is this when everything can be taken away so easily....Kevin. Need to mention that no one dare question her, my children say to me that they fear if they do she will harm herself.

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3 Replies
 actd
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(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11892

Hi and welcome

It's a bad situation to be in, but unfortunately it's something you need to get past and to move on for your own sake.

What is the current situation regarding contact and what are you hoping for?

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(@nevertoolate)
Joined: 13 years ago

New Member
Posts: 2

Well contact with my daughter is a mutual thing, well, will be once she moves up the road. In the divorce she stated that my daughter didnt want to see me, truth was i was seeing her every weekend when my X came to stay wth me. My daughter is 10, she loves being with me, my X said i can look after her so that she can carry on her shifts at the shop, i said that i will not fit in with her shifts, as i want a life too, would rather pick her up from school and bring her here when i have time off. Today i have written to the council and put myside across, its the first time i have made contact as my X continualy kept messing them around with moving then not moving, ive asked for help with re-housing, and asked them to consider the fact i would like somewhere for my daughter to stay, guess will have to see what happens now.....Kevin.

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 actd
Registered
(@dadmod4)
Joined: 15 years ago

Illustrious Member
Posts: 11892

I would be a little careful in some respects - your ex says she wants contact to fit in with her shifts, and you are saying you won't fit in with them. The ideal solution may be somewhere in between the two - the best solution at the moment sounds like mediation.

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