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Hi all
im new here and my name is robert, im 35 and a dad to one little girl called EDA.
7 months ago her mum decided she was leaving our house and going to live with her parents as she was not felling well.
after a few weeks she began to change her story and said that i had been violent towards her and that she was not coming back.
I have never been violent towards her, a lie so she can get free legal aid. ( shocking)
She stopped me seeing my little girl?
I was a full time dad so this was very hard for me to take.
I went into a depression thinking I was never going to see her again and still feel the same.
I know im not alone here and im not usually someone who shares my pain but what I do not get is how a women can lie about me and the courts just go along with it.
It is making me sick to think that when she wishes she can make up a fabricated lie and use a child as a weapon.
Will this ever get better?
p.s i have written a song about missing my child, let me know if you can relate.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bIpYHJO_46s
I totally empathise as my son is going through the same thing. It stains you inside to think that these allegations have been made and that they get believed when it's not true. Whatever happened to innocent till proven guilty.
I can't offer any advice as we are in the same pickle...but I think knowing you are not the only one helps just a little .
Hi Robert and welcome,
That's a beautiful song!
There are things you can do to see your little girl again, please don't give up on that. Without any proof of violence it's possible her allegations will not hold weight and even of they're taken on board it still doesn't mean you won't get to see your little girl.
The first step is to attempt mediation...even if you've asked and shes refused, it's an official refusal you need and this would be supplied by the mediator once he has invited her to attend and she has turned it down. Even if she attends and no solutions are found, you will still be issued with the all important FM1 form that tells the court that all other options have been tried.
It's a pity that you have left it so long but it's still possible to move this forward, it just might mean you have to visit your child at a contact centre for a while until your bond is re established.
Here's a couple of links, the first to the mediation service where you can find a mediator in your area, if the ex lives a long way away it would be preferable to choose one nearest to her to avoid refusal because of distance. The second is to check if you might be eligible for legal aid to cover mediations costs.
www.nfm.org.uk
www.gov.uk/check-legal-aid
Hi thanks
ive done mediation and i have spent over £10,000 on soliciters.
the law allows her to get a non molistation order against me without any proof.
i have recordings of her being the violent person in our relationship, even her own mother knew what was going on and has turned against me.
she is also lying.
i just hope karma will sort it out in the end.
i have seen my litte girl last week for 6 hours and i did not think she would remember me, but guess what she did and she is only 18 months old.
i picked her up from a police station as laughable as that is and when i handed her back to my ex mom she cried out for me. very sad as i know she loves me so much.
its so sickening to think we can be pushed to one side, thank you for your message makes me feel im not on my own in this
best robert williams
...you aren't on your own Robert.
Spending thousands on solicitors is sadly not uncommon, neither is not getting anywhere when doing so. In fact there are dads here that have been there and then decided to self represent, and guess what they are successful!
There are also dads here that have non mols and have still been able to get some contact.
Try posting in the Legal Eagle section, or at least have a read through past post and you will see that we have successes on here.
Have you tried attending an FNF meeting? I really think you would benefit from attending....there's a fantastic one that is held in Chelsea but they also have meetings at branches across the country. Here's a link to the the FNF webpage where you can find details of meetings in your area. Please give it a try....
www.fnf.org.uk/help-and-support/local-branch-meetings
- Samaritans – call 116 123
- Shout – text the word ‘Shout’ to 85258
