Hi all.
I am looking for some advice as I am starting to run out of options.
I am separated from my daughters mother but have been fully involved in my daughters life since the separation over 5 years ago.
I have her every other weekend and have only missed 2 weekends in the last five and half years (due to family being in hospital)
I have never missed a maintenance payment, and even moved my life from Hampshire to Devon to be closer to her, so you get the idea about me a little.
The problem is and has been for some time is that my daughter who is only just 8 years old is massively over weight at just over 7.3 stones and with a waist size of 35 inches and a chest of the same.
I have brought this up with her mother on more than one occasion, and we have both had a meeting with the school nurse around 18 months ago but to be honest was a complete waist of time.
Her mother is not stupid (degree education) and works in the health care profession herself but is in complete denial about the whole situation, she tell the medical professionals what they want to hear in regards to healthy eating etc etc.. (bear in mind her mother is massively overweight also) and they seem to except it and say she will grow out of her weight (she would now need to be nearly 6ft tall!) and no one seems that interested
Myself and my partner now struggle to find clothes that will fit , she cannot fit into clothes for a 12/13 year old now (she is 8 ).
I have raised my concerns yet again and have a meeting with my daughters GP and her mother to talk things through shortly but no one seems at all bothered. If she was massively under weight then I bet they would be.
Is there anything else I can do or anyone else I can involve if nothing changes ?
I have real concerns now about my daughters long term health i.e. diabetes, etc etc..she gets out of breath now doing basic things, and also how desperately unhappy she is more than likely going to be once she goes into her teens and becomes a young adult.
Any help or advice would be gratefully appreciated.
Regards
Jon
I don't think there is a lot that can be done unless you can get a medical professional to go on record stating its a serious medical issue, then it would go down the route of neglect etc which imo it already is
As T has said, there's very little more that you can do that you aren't already doing. You have involved the school and GP ...you can ask for a referral to a Dietician, and perhaps there are other NHS services that the GP can refer her on to also.
Best of luck
I understand your concern, and commend everything you are doing already, but I'm a bit confused about your post. How tall is your daughter currently?
Once she hits puberty, her height could grow quite quickly without her weight changing much and it will even out. I was a Very large kid until I was 11, 9and a half stone. II grew tall in comp and @ 5"8, 10 St 5, I'm now called lanky.
@ 7.5stone, a height of 5ft at 16 would put her on the 44th percentile according to the NHS bmi site. So just about average.
I understand your concern, and commend everything you are doing already, but I'm a bit confused about your post. How tall is your daughter currently?
Once she hits puberty, her height could grow quite quickly without her weight changing much and it will even out. I was a Very large kid until I was 11, 9and a half stone. II grew tall in comp and @ 5"8, 10 St 5, I'm now called lanky.
@ 7.5stone, a height of 5ft at 16 would put her on the 44th percentile according to the NHS bmi site. So just about average.
I think the 35" waist measurement rules out the the height argument. It might be worth having a word with social services about this - at her age, this can be laying down a lot of issues for her in later life (and not that much later) - diabetes being the obvious one, but all sorts of other complications. Is there any chance you ca get her interested in physical activities that will help - perhaps swimming with you?