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[Solved] Application for custody

 
Devastateddad41
(@Devastateddad41)
Trusted Member Registered

Hi,
My wife is currently classed as the main carer for my 3 children. They live with her and I have them 3 nights per week.
She holds the child benefit book and claims the payment. I do not see a penny of that but have a tax charge due to my income.

I live in the family home. The childrens bedrooms were decorated just prior to them leaving and when they stay with me, they have their little sanctuaries and have their own rooms rather than sharing when with their mother.

If I wanted to go for full custody - how do I go about it?

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 03/10/2014 4:30 pm
1626
 1626
(@1626)
Prominent Member Registered

Unless there are safeguarding issues that you can report and that require an emergency application, you would have to apply for Child Arrangement Order but courts don't just transfer residency without good reason. You would probably be better attending mediation to work out a more suitable arrangement (it is mandatory before applying to court) for your children. If you are unable to do this then you can apply to the court using a C100, this is a last resort and should be avoided where possible, it's not a pleasant experience and can affect your children.

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Posted : 04/10/2014 12:58 pm
DaveR
(@DaveR)
Noble Member Registered

Hi.

I agree, unless there are safeguarding issues sole residency may be a challenge.

My former is disabled, failed a grugs test, has a history of personality issues, alchohol, drugs and anger issues yet she got residency and I got contact.

She alledged domestic violence, I think, to level the playing field. Nothing proven, no police etc because it is tosh.

I live in the family home and she stays with her parents where our children share a room yet in the family home our children have a room each. 4 bed house with large garden with swing, slide, see saw, summer house. Its a playground.

I applied for sole residency and shared yet got contact.

My advice is to think about shared residency and ask for extra time with the children if your going to go to court. Although 3 nights per week is not as bad as it could be, its more time than our children get with me despite making it clear that they wish to spend more time with me.

Shared residency is key in my opinion as it puts you both on an equal footing in terms of legaly, schools etc.

Contact is rubbish in my opinion as it effectively makes you a nobody if your former doesnt want to involve you.

just my 2 cents.

Regards,

Dave

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Posted : 04/10/2014 3:11 pm
MR SLIM
(@MR SLIM)
Noble Member Registered

Can you still apply for shared residency? I thought I was just a child arrangement order?

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Posted : 04/10/2014 3:14 pm
DaveR
(@DaveR)
Noble Member Registered

Hi Slim,

Your right that its a child arrangement order. I think the wording is where the child lives. i.e. With both of you rather than one of you and the other having contact.

I will stand corrected though as my order was about 3 months before the new arrangements orders started.

Regards,

Dave

ReplyQuote
Posted : 04/10/2014 3:52 pm
Devastateddad41
(@Devastateddad41)
Trusted Member Registered

Cheers guys.
It is really upsetting that she was the one not happen yet moved out with the children. Now she is sponging off benefits and screwing me financially. The kids were happy living here. They have friends in the area, local amenities are close, and have their own bedrooms. It's never fair that the mother is awarded as the primary carer. Whilst she is a good mother, I am equally a doting, loving father. She should have left on her own, moved in with her interfering mother and had an agreed access arrangement. Could the children making a decision on where they want to live be taken into consideration?
I have asked about mediation and she refuses.

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Topic starter Posted : 04/10/2014 8:53 pm
1626
 1626
(@1626)
Prominent Member Registered

Slim, you're right, you don't apply for shared residency any longer. The new system is worded as to where the children reside on which days which is the CAO.

Devdad, your children's wishes maybe taken into account, depending on their age, as Dave R has said, you might be better asking for a larger portion of time with them as opposed to asking for a change of residency.

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Posted : 05/10/2014 12:35 pm
Rizzy123
(@Rizzy123)
Eminent Member Registered

hi, I'm currently at the start of my divorce loop, i see in your post that "The Family Court provides free counselling and mediation services to help in resolving disputes (contact the Family Court Co-ordinator at your local Family Court)." how do you go about setting this up, the missus has stopped talking to me about arrangements but I want to keep things moving along as amicably as possible and this may be the only route open to me at the moment. I am meeting my solicitor for the first time today so will hopefully get more guidance from him, but all help at this point is greatly received

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Posted : 10/07/2015 10:53 am
Mojo
 Mojo
(@Mojo)
Illustrious Member Registered

Rizzy....please disregard the post that you have responded to above, unfortunately it's by a divorce attorney in the US who is probably touting for business. The laws in the US are different to here in the UK and I have deleted their account.

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Posted : 10/07/2015 4:09 pm
Rizzy123 liked
Rizzy123
(@Rizzy123)
Eminent Member Registered

thought it was too good to be true..........oh welll back to counting the pennies 🙁

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Posted : 10/07/2015 9:14 pm
actd
 actd
(@actd)
Illustrious Member

Rizzy....please disregard the post that you have responded to above, unfortunately it's by a divorce attorney in the US who is probably touting for business. The laws in the US are different to here in the UK and I have deleted their account.

Presumably not the brightest of lawyers touting for US business on a UK

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Posted : 12/07/2015 6:16 pm
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