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Illness

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Posts: 8
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Topic starter
(@concernedfather17)
Active Member
Joined: 7 years ago

Hi,

 

So, we have a CAO, my children spend equal time with both myself and their Mother.

Every weekend I pick them up, my 10 year old Daughter comes back ill, bad tummy, headache, tired, etc, this weekend my Daughter and my 7 year old son, have both come back with colds.

Sounds stupid, but they come home, they have their 5 a day if not more, plenty of fluids, good sleep and within a couple of days my Daughter is back on top of the world.

I have been through Social Services, and Child Services, been through Court, on several occasions, not about this issue, but more concerning matters, and to be honest it feels as if no one really gives a [censored]. A tap on the wrist, don't do it again, or we will put some support in place for 6 weeks, which after the support is finished, it just goes back to normal.

I guess, I really don't know what to do about it. I'm feeling pretty worn out, as if whatever I do, isn't enough. The kids obviously want a relationship with their Mum, they want to go, and I understand it, but I do feel that they are not being looked after properly. 

8 Replies
Posts: 790
Registered
(@Daddyup)
Prominent Member
Joined: 5 years ago

Hi

 

What is it that you are saying the mother is or isn't doing?

 

What support would you like from social services or the courts or child services? That they are not providing? 

 

Thanks 

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1 Reply
Registered
(@concernedfather17)
Joined: 7 years ago

Active Member
Posts: 8

@Daddyup

Hi,

I feel that the kids are being neglected when they are with their Mum, not getting the proper amount of sleep, nutrition, attention etc. Talking to her literally does no good. 

I have had safeguarding issues in the past, whilst they have been in the care of their Mum. My Daughter has come home, and said that she's worried about her brother being hurt, because he's been hit by Mums boyfriend etc. It just gets swept under the carpet by Social Services. It was alleged by my Daughter, and later backed up by my Son that he was placed in a footwell of a vehicle whilst travelling with the neighbour aa there wasn't enough space for all of them. This was denied by Mum, and when questioned by Social she called the children liars and was warned of the impact on their emotional wellbeing.

 

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Posts: 790
Registered
(@Daddyup)
Prominent Member
Joined: 5 years ago

I think the examples are you are giving are quite different to each other. The safeguarding concerns you have valid grounds but unfortunately as is often the case there are slaps on wrist etc and a little bit of advice.

 

Re the lack of sleep, nutrition, attention etc these are all challenges that parents up and down the country face and courts do not get involved. In my opinion (and others may jump in to disagree) all you can do is try to talk, educate, support your daughter when with you and bring up with good habits that carry over to time when with mum. 

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Posts: 702
Registered
(@warwickshire1)
Prominent Member
Joined: 6 years ago

I agree with above. If social services havent done anything up until now then by raising further concerns its likely to make things worse for you. 

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Posts: 670
(@dadmod3)
Honorable Member
Joined: 5 years ago

Have you talked to the school to find out how they are performing?  The school should know if they are troubled, although with the recent lockdown, it might be more difficult.  However, you could talk to them and explain your concerns.  There might be some counselling they could offer.  If they are being harmed then social searches should be made aware.  The school might be better placed to get to the bottom of it.

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