Hello everyone new here. I'm asking on behalf of my friends
They are currently going through a separation have been married for 6 years, currently still living together in a mortgaged property with a 3 year old daughter.
The problem is the mother is originally from Yorkshire but has lived down in Nottingham for the last 10 years. They have a mortgaged property in Yorkshire that her father currently lives in on extremely low rent. They also have a mortgaged property in Nottingham where they are both still living.
Since they decided to separate the mother has stated that she would like them to sell the house 20k under the asking price to her father who lives there. The dad wants to buy her out of the house in Nottingham, has agreed to give her the majority of the equity so she can buy another house close by so that they can have 50 50 custody of the daughter.
However the mother keeps changing rhe goal posts and anytime the father doesn't agree she threatens to take the daughter to Yorkshire and said he can't do anything about it and he would just have to travel every other weekend a 5 hour round trip Friday and then back again Sunday.
The father is agreeing to more and more money for her out of the property and she says she will stay local but the is telling friends and family she might move if she doesn't get her own way.
He has asked if she will attend mediation to put an agreement together but she won't as she said she may decide to move depending on if she's happy 6 months down the line but If not she might still move away. She has also spoken to a solicitor and the police to check that she can move and says she can as she would be telling him so.
He feels increasingly on tenterhooks as feels every day might be the last time he sees his daughter depending in the mood of the mother.
What would be the next course of action if she won't agree to mediation?
Thanks in advance.
Hi,
it must be a very stressful position he is in. if ex is refusing mediation, then next step could be to apply to court for a child arrangements order. In that he could apply for a prohibited steps order, to ask court to prevent child from moving that far away. not sure if it will be successful. If child was of school age, it could have been argued that child is settled in school and education will be disrupted. ex will likely tell court she has family support in the new location, which I imagine would help her case. he could try this legal route to prevent the move, and courts would decide if the move would be in child's best interests. He may want to consider seeking legal advice.
I went through a similar situation over 15 years ago, and my ex moved from Bedford to Manchester shortly after the settlement - there was nothing I could do to stop it, and I had the 5 or 6 hour round trip every alternate weekend. I can't see that a court would order that she stays in the Nottingham area, so my advice is that he should assume she will do whatever she wants, which will almost certainly mean she moves to Yorkshire, and he needs to work on that basis.
In short yes she can do that and there is nothing you can do about it. From someone who has been through it I understand just how bad it feels.
Yes, she can do this...