[Solved] Where Do I Stand ?
great to hear from you again 🙂 if your going to ask for 50/50 then only fri-sun every other weekend is a lot less than that. proper 50/50 would be you have equal day-to-day care of child. There are some dads on here that have 50/50. they have arrangement like 1 week on and 1 week off with kids. some alternate days, every 2 days etc, but seems manic. share half of school holidays. you also have to think about your job and if there's any flexibility, like would you be able to do school runs in future?
I hope you can sort things out in mediation. If it goes to court I think it will be difficult for you to achieve a 50/50 arrangement, due to child's age at present. if your ex is against it, then decision rests with court.
Yeah i was talking to a friend last week and he said 1 of his friend had a court hearing and he went for 50/50 and because of his job the court turned him down so he tried Friday, Saturday & Sunday but he only got every other weekend Saturday and Sunday only.
What is realistic at the age of 2 or what should i settle for in mediation ?
one of my kids turned 2 recently. as this was going through courts, child was new born and I started at seeing child for just 30 mins a week. then became 1 hour, then 2 and a half. It's been 7 hours every 2 weeks for a couple of months. overnights will start when she is 2 and a half. will be just sun-mon overnight. when she is 3, it will go to fri-mon.
try to make your arrangement future-proof. it would be annoying to return to mediation or go to court at a later stage, to ask can child spend school holidays with you. you can ask if you can have child mid-week as well, so you don't end up waiting 2 weeks at a time to see him.
I would make sure you get midweek contact preferably an overnight stay and then due to young age of child ask for 1 night every weekend so that would equal 8 nights in total out of 28
Just a quick update on my side of things, i have now booked a online meeting with a Mediator this Thursday so will see what they say, and what they advise, i have spoke to my ex and she said i could have our son every Sunday and possibly 1 night a month sleep over at mine, but it's ok her saying that but she may not agree to it on paper, so will see what happens, my son turned 2 last month ......
If you have agreed arrangements with your ex, have you considered getting a solicitor to draft a consent order and getting this signed off by the court instead? No mediator required and it will tell you whether your ex is serious about the arrangement. Useful link below..