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Child maintenance when staying at partners house

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Since our split my partner has stayed in our house and covers all the costs of the house through benefits and partly from a badly paid job.

I've ended in accommodation at the moment where my boy can't stay over.

I'm regularly at her address and often stay the night on the sofa, taking him to school, tidying, driving her about sometimes weeks on end! She will often go out and I look after him all night , sometimes on my own or sometimes with her passed out and not surfacing till the next afternoon 😡

Where I agree she is paying for the bills, I am paying to feed him whilst she goes out, put him. To bed and look after him. 

She is now questioning the amount of child support I pay as I have said I've had enough of being a mug 🤣

Where do I stand as including when I take him away ( at least 4 weeks this year ) the nights I have spent with him alone are not 52, but if you take into account all the nights I'm with him at hers alone it's way over 🤣

So I'm paying maintenance, feeding him, taxiing her and doing housework but now being asked for more money 🤷🏼‍♂️



Topic starter Posted : 29/04/2023 3:53 pm
Illustrious Member


You can use cms calculator as a guide to work out payments:

See if you can keep arrangement private. If she goes through CMS,  you will likely pay lot more if not having child minimum of 1 overnight stay per week.

Posted : 02/05/2023 2:02 pm
Honorable Member

I'm wondering whether she has a drink problem?  Do you think she drinks when you're not there?  Are you happy with how she cares for your son? You could speak to the school/nursery if he's old enough to go.  They will let you know how he is there.  If you're still concerned then speak to social services.  You could consider mediation to sort this out and get it on a firmer footing.

Posted : 02/05/2023 7:58 pm

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