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Definition of nights

 
Guano23uk
(@guano23uk)
New Member Registered

I’ve got an unusual situation. 

I’ve two boys and one has developed quite bad anxiety to the point we’re he struggle to sleep at my house. Everything else is normal and I facilitate moving him back and forth to his mothers house. My cost of caring for him has increased of anything and it has no financial impact on my ex. Btw, if she wants to go out she does and when her boyfriend is in town she is ‘away’. 

so the point is I have always had my boys on average 3 nights a week. She is now claiming that my eldest son never stays and therefore she is due more maintenance. This is really disingenuous as I also pay lots more on top of maintenance to buy clothes, trainers, bike maintenance, sports clubs etc. don’t get me wrong I want to do this for my son, but the financial cost is real and it is all the more galling because she is now wanting more. For at least 7 years I have also overpaid, amounting to around £8k (assume this is dead money now). 

How would the CSA consider this? From what o have read it seems it will just be taken as 1 night a week because we are in dispute. Its ******** 

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 26/01/2022 9:47 pm
Bill337
(@bill337)
Famed Member

hi,

how old are the kids? are you paying her through the Child Maintenance Service? yes they state that if there is a dispute about number of nights a child stays with a parent, they would class it as 1 overnight stay a week. If she is being dishonest then I would suggest you start gathering evidence like send CMS any information like calendar entries of kids staying with you, or time/date stamped photos of them all staying with you late night/mornings. any messages between you and ex confirming days/times that kids are staying with you.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 27/01/2022 9:15 am
Guano23uk
(@guano23uk)
New Member Registered

@bill337 the problem is physically my son rarely stays overnight because of the anxiety of sleeping. But he is with me until late on these nights and I do throughout the weekends and everything else (clubs, clothes, food, travel etc). Basically my costs are still incurred and hers are not, yet just because he doesn’t stay overnight much I am penalised again. It’s immoral really. 

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 27/01/2022 11:44 am
Guano23uk
(@guano23uk)
New Member Registered

Not paying through CMS but she is threatening to get them involved. Boys are 14 and 11. Eldest one is the issue.

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 27/01/2022 11:46 am
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