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Here's my situation.
Myself and my partner both had a previous relationship that included having kids.
I have 2 kids with my ex, 2 boys, 1 who is now over 16 and left school. I paid maintenance for them both quite happily with an agreement with my ex...until she got greedy and got the CSA involved to see if she could get more money. They decided she was entitled to more, I paid it no problem since it was for my kids anyway. Like I said though, only paying for 1 now as 1 has gone off on his own.
My partner has 4 kids with her ex. All under 16. He is on incapacity benefit so pays nothing for them via CSA. These kids all stay with us (mine stay with their mum). The arrangement with my partners ex was we would pay for everything, school clothes, dinners, shoes, jackets, you know the stuff they need 🙂 Holidays also, we are just back from a week away with them all 😉 They stay with us all the time except for every second weekend and a few weeks during the school holidays where they stay with their dad. He pays for nothing for them, which we are okay with as it means less hassle as he is not the most forthcoming individual.
Question is this (at last they all say lol)...
While they are on holiday at their dads house we get constant demands for money from him. It starts from when he knows he is taking them during the holidays until they come back to us. He needs electric, he needs petrol, he needs this or that. It's almost like because we are both working he expects handouts from us, if we say he doesn't have a right to it, he threatens to not see the kids.
Does he actually have a right to demand money from us while he has his kids?
Cheers for any replies 🙂
simple answer NO ! Its like he's baby sitting and doing you a favour, how dare he blackmail you, he probably knows you enjoy the break if he was asking for food for the kids that's different.
My ex many moons made me pay his fuel to pick his kids up or he wouldn't have them, he had a well paid job, I went along with it for a while as I needed the break and wanted the kids to know their Father.. Mug me eh !
Hi there 🙂
In a word....no! If he were paying your partner through the CSA he would get a reduction for the alternate weekends the children stay with him and that would cover costs.
However, if he threatens not to see the kids there is more involved than simply what he is entitled to. It is at least a break for you and your partner, to have a couple of days every fortnight just to do things as a couple... and the kids feelings also come into play. So although he isn't entitled to anything you have to weight up the costs to you all as a family.
best of luck 🙂
Hi Styles
Thank you fore your post. I am William the Child Maintenance Options consultant. I understand that your partner has four children to her ex-partner which he does not pay child maintenance to, however, when he has them for over a week he is requesting money from you. You would like to know if your partner should be paying him maintenance.
If your partner is able to come to an agreement between her and her ex-partner regarding maintenance for their children. This is known as a family-based arrangement where they can both agree who will provide what for their children. There are no strict rules or formulas that you have to stick to when calculating your payments. It does not have to be about money and it can include other kinds of support, for example providing clothes and child care. Family-based arrangements are not legally binding, however, they can be quick, easy and free to set up.
If your partner can not negotiate with her ex-partner she may wish to follow the Child Support Agency (CSA) guidelines. The CSA has four different maintenance rates and the rate that is to be paid is dependent on her ex-partner's net income. The rate that he would pay: The Nil or Flat rate depending how many nights her ex-partner has their children.
- Nil rate is where paying parents earn less than £5 a week, are in full-time education, under sixteen, in prison or living in care
- Flat rate is when paying parents pay a flat rate of £5 child maintenance per week, no matter how many children they have, if their weekly net income is between £5 and £100. This also applies if the partner they live with is in receipt of Incapacity Benefit, Income Support, income-based Jobseeker's Allowance or Pension Credit.
Your partner can find further information regarding the different rates online at www.gov.uk/child-maintenance. If your partner has any questions about how they calculate maintenance, or if she would like more details about their service, she may wish to speak to the CSA directly.
Alternatively, if you prefer a confidential chat with one of our agents, you can call us on our freephone number 0800 988 0988. We are open Monday to Friday 8am to 8pm and Saturday 9am to 4pm.
I hope this helps.
William
Sorry, that didn't really help lol.
We know all that info from the CSA, 🙂
My question was about him demanding money from us while he has his kids during the holidays, when he pays nothing to us for them.
Assuming your partner is the parent with care - which is the case, he had to pay her maintenance for the children. If he has the children for more than 52 days of the year, then the maintenance calculation is changed, and the amount of maintenance he pays is reduced, unless he is paying at the flat rate, or the nil rate - which he is, in which case, the payments are not reduced further.
In other words, you can tell him where to go - he has no right to be asking you for money at all.
Oh dear Styles, can I add my "no" to the rest of the resounding "No" you have already received!
If he wants them for contact he pays for them, including leccy, petrol et. Don't tell me he uses a lot more leccy because he has a couple o kids staying..I don't think so!!! The only thing he might use more of is food!
Still I appreciate you both do probably enjoy the break ... 🙂 But I would not be blackmailed by him myself.
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