Hello I'm in need of advice urgently!!
My ex partner is basically telling me I am going to lose my rights to our son, in a previous message she has said she has a legal team in place for me to relinquish my rights to her. I basically told her I would not do that. So the reply I got was I've waited 21months I can wait another 3.
I just need To know what she means by this, and where I stand.
Please feel free to ask me anything
Hi there
That doesn't make much sense to me! She can't apply to court for you to relinquish your rights, even if you wanted to do this off your own back you would find it extremely hard to do, it's very rare and there would have to be some really serious reasons for a court to allow it.
I don't know what would take 24 months to achieve in law either! She could apply for a Prohibited Steps Order to prevent you having contact, but if you are named on the child's birth certificate, you have Parental Responsibility and that can't be taken away, even if you are stopped from having direct contact. If she applied for such an order you would receive court papers to attend ...and it wouldn't take her 2 years to accomplish; from applying to court, to the first hearing, would take about 6-8 weeks.
If you have no contact with your child you can apply to court for a Child Arrangements Order for contact, you would need to attempt mediation first, after you have spoken to a mediator, she would be asked to attend, if she refuses or mediation fails, the mediator will sign the form to enable you to apply to court. Here's a link to the mediation service
www.nfm.org.uk
Have a read of the stickys at the top of the legal eagle section, you'll find lots of information about the court process. Many here have chosen to represent themselves, as solicitors can cost thousands... it's very doable and we can advise and support you through it.
If it's been quite a while since you've had contact, you may have to start contact in a contact centre, just until you can re establish a relationship with your child.
All the best
Thankyou very much, that has cleared things up for me.
I have had very limited contact with my son, but that's purely based differences between me and his mother.
I will definitely seek mediation and am pretty sure she will refuse.
Thank you again
Also is there anything I could do to show that I want to see my child that can help me if things become difficult? I was thinking of a letter to the mother asking for some access
i would see what the reaction to mediation is before you do anything else, at the moment you don't want to give her an excuse to escalate matters any further than necessary.