My wife kicked me out a few weeks ago, things have been bad between us for a while. We have a 3 month old daughter, who she is refusing to let me see. She has offered contact but knows it clashes with access to my son from a previous relationship, says she doesn't care and neither will a court. All attempts to contact her are met with abuse or ignorance.
What should my next step be? I am not in a position financially to go to a solicitor.
Hi there and welcome to the forum
If she won't be sensible and agree then your only choice really is to set up mediation and consider court action if that doesn't work. Attempting mediation is mandatory before a court will accept an application.
Only agreements made in court are legally binding so I wouldn't worry about not being able to afford to instruct a solicitor.
Perhaps you could start with an formalish letter or email (try to keep communication in writing) asking her to consider a reasonable schedule, make clear the times you are available and possibly consider having the contact take place while you have your other child? You could indicate that if you are unable to agree that you will set up mediation and invite her to attend.
Here is a link to mediation
Hi There,
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As Yoda has said, your first fromal step would be mediation to see if you can make any agreements around contact and if that fails or she won't attend then you would have to apply to court.
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If your end up in court you can self represent and many of us have done this it isn;t as bad as you would think and you can get just as good a result as a solicitor would without the extra cost.
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GTTS
Thankyou for your replies. I've tried to be civil and arrange contact with her personally, but her only solution (and she refuses to compromise) is that I spend Friday night and all day Saturday at her home. I can't agree to this, since she can't even reply to an e-mail without being abusive and nasty, never mind spend time with me in an enclosed space.
She thinks that because, during her pregnancy, I spoke to her consultant about her mental health (she threatened suicide and told me she was going to force me to put my unborn daughter up for adoption) that I will refuse to return my daughter if I see her anywhere other than at her house.
I have spoken to a mediator and have a meeting with him later this week. Will it still count as an attempt if she doesn't turn up?
Hi there
Yes it will, After you have met with the mediator and discussed the issues and what you would like to happen, the mediator will contact your ex and ask her to attend, if she refuses, ignores the request or mediation fails, the mediator will then sign the application form which will enable you to apply for a Child Arrangements Order for contact.
All the best
It's quite common for mediation to be refused or to fail, then as Mojo says, the mediator will stamp the form so that you can make an application to the court. Good luck.