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Two and a half years after the FDA hearing we have finally had the FDR hearing. Her new solicitors are so agressive and blame me for everything. So I was prepared that they would attempt to go down the conduct route. Even though they are in the top 500 they are a law unto themselves. I know that the bar for conduct to be considered is very high and also it has to have had an impact on the family assets. I did have special measures in the court because she does frighten me in an emotional way. We obviously exchanged updated disclosures and i was gobsmacked to see that to date she has spent £107,000 on legal fees!!!!!She has done everything through her solicitors and her new ones seem charge £3500 a month.So we also exchanged WP offers.I suggested we sell her home and go 50/50 giving us about £380000 each For me that still would not buy me a property in or near our area . The pension report recommended 62% share in my favour. Then her solictors wrote to the pension expert company and asked about calculating figures for th time we were together. They said that is a new request and it would cost £800 + VAT and we both had to agree. So they wrote to me seeking my permission. I refused as this was not directed in the Order and asked why was this was not included in their first letter of instruction? On the day of the hearing I read that they went to another company without my permission and got the figures. She she offered £150,000, £63000 to cover the pension and she keeps the FMH.
I could not believe it. Knowing her as I do I really do think she knows I cannot do anything other rent a room. I have not idea where my daughter will go and of course our son will stay with her and I really do think she will go back to Court to change the CAO on the grounds that it is in our son's best interest to remain in the FMH. So no agreement was reached. It was agreed we will go to final hearing.
Now she wants us to go to arbitration and sent me three arbitrators to consider. To be honest something does not feel right. So I am going to three of my own because I simply have no faith her legal team. I do think she could have suggested this earlier rather than us attending the FDR Hearing. She will cover the cost for two days.I will propose she also pays my barrister's fees. It will be two days of berating me, and painting a very negative image of me. They are saying I have not given full disclosure and it goes on.
Monday I will speak to my solictor and get advice.
I obviously will keep you updated. Right now I am retiring to bed to relax after a really stressful few weeks.
hi,
yes you should relax and find ways to de-stress. did court order you to try arbitration? her proposal does look unreasonable and not going to meet your housing needs. hopefully the judge will make a fair decision if both of you can not agree.
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This morning I saw my wife as I was driving. I tried to do a u-turn to avoid her and she turned around and ran in a different direction. I then turned around again to resume my journey only to see her again and again she ran when she saw me.
When i got home i saw she had sent a message to me. she indicated that she would like us to talk and try and reach an agreement.
I responded and said i would that too. I said i owuld unable to meet her face to face . However, happy to face time or phone.
She then said her solicitors were going to send me an offer. Then she said she has disinstructed her solicitors and she was not a LiP.. She advised that she would be informing the court and would send the offer to me. in due course.
I do not know why she has made the decision to become a LiP and obviously I am very keen to see her new offer. However, because of her controlling nature I am not expecting to recieve her offer tomorrow. She will keep me waiting I think. However, if she wants to go to arbitration I really would appreciate any comments from anyone who has taken that route. I will keep you updated .
@tireddad hi, it's very likely her legal fees are skyrocketing, so probably why she is now self representing. hopefully it goes well. could discuss and negotiate with her by email.
@dadmod2 She has taken out a litigation loan for £100,000. I assume that will be paid off now she is representing herself??
@tireddad she could be on payment plan and still paying off those debts.
She has told me that she need to sell the FMH and her investment property to pay of the £83000 litigation loan
@tireddad sounds unreasonable, wouldn't those sales affect the children negatively? she could sell her investment prop, and any outstanding amounts, she can arrange an affordable payment plan to pay it back.
Mediation might be the best route. It will be cheaper and quicker than court
@dadmod3 We tried mediation but said if we do mediation we do not have to adhere to the FDA Order I did not agree so she did not proceed.
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