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Court Order

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I have a court order agreement put in recently and the court order started on the 18th Oct where I pick my children up from their mother's house which she did not want but the judge said there was no domestic abuse and would mean the children would be doing a lot of unnecessary travelling.

So on the first pick which was the 18th Oct my ex came to the car and tried start a argument with myself and my partner (my partner drives , I don't) she said some not so nice things to my partner but my partner just ignored her. The kids got in the car and we enjoyed the day.


The 25th Oct I pick the kids up at 10am like the court order agreement states, which I turned up at 9.50 and my ex again approached the car then accused me of drinking alcohol which I had 2 cans of carling 440ml the night before about 7pm ( I has an issue with drinking when I was with living my ex but since I have left her I don't drink the way I used too, I might have a total of 6-7 cans in a week.) 

She refused me to take the kids which turned into a big argument between my ex myself and current partner, so my partner said they will take me to the police station to get a breathalyser so which we did, but the women at the station even said she cant smell alcohol or even looking drunk and that I am entitled a drink as long as I am not doing it when I have my children. They didn't do breathalyser there but she said Halfords do we went Halfords got one and went back to my ex and did it in front of her and it showed that I had no traces of alcohol in my system this was all about 12pm so she allowed the kids to come with me.


Now we approaching the weekend where the kids are doing their first overnight stay with me and she said I got do another breathalyser and said Ill do one more time but I wont be doing it again and she then kicked off with me again down the phone saying I am not having the kids at all this weekend and that I will have to find her and the kids. 

Saying that I was drunk on the Saturday even though I did the breathalyser in front of her and came back normal, saying I haven't changed which I have but she not see or speak to enough to know that I have changed just making accusations .

We had to go through Cafcass and they even asked us both was their any safeguarding issues which we both said no.

When I went to the police station they but down as a incident but not going to do anything about it , she said just log it in case you need to go back to the courts


Now my question is..... Will I have to take her back to courts as I have to pay for it and I do not have the funds to keep taking her back to courts as I am struggling finically. She would get everything for free as she does not work

I have told family courts and Cafcass but waiting to hear back from them 

Topic starter Posted : 30/11/2023 8:19 pm
Illustrious Member


the impression I get is that your ex is probably jealous of your partner and does not want the kids to be around her. I think best solution here would be for you to pick up the kids from school on a friday. how far do you live from your ex? if not that far, could perhaps drop the kids to school on monday morning after a long weekend. i think handovers at school will eliminate the trouble. if you receive any benefits, you could submit a court application for free, by using a help with fees form. you could also self-represent and save a lot of money. It can be done with the right guidance.

Posted : 30/11/2023 9:57 pm

how contact centres work

Active Member Registered


thank you for your reply , unfortunately I work Monday - Friday 8-4 so I won’t be able to do school drop off and my partner has her daughter to take school and drop off which both school are 30 mins away from each other . I do not drive but currently in the process in learning.

I won’t be able to get any help as I have asked the question before but because I work full time I’m not entitled to any help 

my partner as at the stage where she does not want to park outside my ex house to collect the kids and would rather park around the corner and I go get them and then walk around the corner with them , our only other option is pick up at a contact centre which my ex contact centre is only 10 minutes away from her

i just don’t know what to do now as I will collect the kids again this Saturday at arrange time but I know it will kick off and her refusing to send the kids out. 
I can’t be sat there this weekend waiting for her to decide when she wants to send them out as my partner as an appointment that she can not miss 

I haven’t got the funds to take her back to court so I just feel like there is no hope and she always keep the kids away from me even though there is a court order in place 

Topic starter Posted : 01/12/2023 8:20 am
Honorable Member

Its a good idea to park round the corner as that should reduce the tension.  Log every incident in case you do need to go back to court.  There are some helpful guides on sorting out child arrangements on the website.  You don't need a solicitor to go back to court.  Would it help to go to mediation although that is usually done before court, not after.  One letter from a solicitor pointing out the consequences if she breaches the order may worth considering.

Posted : 04/12/2023 9:36 am

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