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[Solved] unsupervised contact at contact centres

 
(@BMurkin)
Honorable Member Registered

What's the point? Seriously

I can understand if the father lives 100s of miles away or if it was supervised contact, but what's the point of using them when the wife is happy for unsupervised and the father lives half hour from wife.

I've been paying £80 per week for 2 hours at a centre thats 10min from my wifes house and I live half hour from her.

Yeah there's the non molestation order but that clearly states that I can visit her house to pick up son. She doesn't even have to see me just get her parents to hand him over.

Theres no justification for it other than my wife just taking the [censored] and punishing me.

The judge is still faffing about with the arrangement order application, no date set for directions hearing . He has had it for 6 weeks now.

Me and the wife are not gonna come to an agreement. I'm pretty certain. So I'll need to ask for an interim order since this contact centre continue. What are the likely hood of getting an interim. I would hate it if judge tries to bully me to accept wifes terms or carry on at centre.

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 22/03/2015 3:30 pm
actd
 actd
(@actd)
Illustrious Member

contact centres are often only a short term solution anyway, being there until a more permanent solution is found. You could ask the court that contact is gradually moved away from the contact centre - starting with, say, 30 minutes out of the centre on each visit and increasing, until using the contact centre only as a handover point.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 22/03/2015 9:24 pm

(@mrstrange)
Estimable Member Registered
Posted by: @BMurkin

What's the point? Seriously

I can understand if the father lives 100s of miles away or if it was supervised contact, but what's the point of using them when the wife is happy for unsupervised and the father lives half hour from wife.

I've been paying £80 per week for 2 hours at a centre thats 10min from my wifes house and I live half hour from her.

Yeah there's the non molestation order but that clearly states that I can visit her house to pick up son. She doesn't even have to see me just get her parents to hand him over.

Theres no justification for it other than my wife just taking the [censored] and punishing me.

The judge is still faffing about with the arrangement order application, no date set for directions hearing . He has had it for 6 weeks now.

Me and the wife are not gonna come to an agreement. I'm pretty certain. So I'll need to ask for an interim order since this contact centre continue. What are the likely hood of getting an interim. I would hate it if judge tries to bully me to accept wifes terms or carry on at centre.

I feel your frustration. As difficult as it it, you have to accept the court process. At FHDR contested interim arrangements can only be ordered if heard by a judge or Legal Adviser with a Lay Magistrate. If that's not the case than you have to accept whatever contact you ex offers you. 

 

It's a bumpy road but keep your head focused on being the best father that you can be to your child during supervised visits. There is an end to all of this and that will be the final hearing. Remain positive 🙂

 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/04/2022 5:50 pm
(@dadlad)
Estimable Member Registered
Posted by: @mrstrange
Posted by: @BMurkin

What's the point? Seriously

I can understand if the father lives 100s of miles away or if it was supervised contact, but what's the point of using them when the wife is happy for unsupervised and the father lives half hour from wife.

I've been paying £80 per week for 2 hours at a centre thats 10min from my wifes house and I live half hour from her.

Yeah there's the non molestation order but that clearly states that I can visit her house to pick up son. She doesn't even have to see me just get her parents to hand him over.

Theres no justification for it other than my wife just taking the [censored] and punishing me.

The judge is still faffing about with the arrangement order application, no date set for directions hearing . He has had it for 6 weeks now.

Me and the wife are not gonna come to an agreement. I'm pretty certain. So I'll need to ask for an interim order since this contact centre continue. What are the likely hood of getting an interim. I would hate it if judge tries to bully me to accept wifes terms or carry on at centre.

I feel your frustration. As difficult as it it, you have to accept the court process. At FHDR contested interim arrangements can only be ordered if heard by a judge or Legal Adviser with a Lay Magistrate. If that's not the case than you have to accept whatever contact you ex offers you. 

 

It's a bumpy road but keep your head focused on being the best father that you can be to your child during supervised visits. There is an end to all of this and that will be the final hearing. Remain positive 🙂

 

What if the ex doesn’t want you to have any contact just to punish you?

How do they decide on what contact if the other parent is not cooperating in any way?

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/04/2022 5:57 pm

top tips to support your child after breakup

(@mrstrange)
Estimable Member Registered

@dadlad 

If you arrive at the final hearing and haven't reached an agreement, the court will order arrangements using recommendations from CAFCASS and evidence that both parties have provided.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/04/2022 6:32 pm
(@dadlad)
Estimable Member Registered

@mrstrange 

I have my FHDRA soon and the ex isn’t being cooperative at all.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/04/2022 6:57 pm

how contact centres work

(@mrstrange)
Estimable Member Registered

@dadlad 

Hopefully her barrister will offer you supervised contact at a contact centre. Depending on availability this could be for 2 hours every other weekend.

 

It won't be what you wish for, however positive observations by the contact centre could be used to your advantage as witness statements to counteract allegations by your ex.

 

You could consider enquire with a few local contact centres and propose them to your ex. Some contact is better than no contact and will make the transition to unsupervised contact quicker when the time comes. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 28/04/2022 7:07 pm
DadLad and DadLad reacted
(@dadlad)
Estimable Member Registered
Posted by: @mrstrange

@dadlad 

Hopefully her barrister will offer you supervised contact at a contact centre. Depending on availability this could be for 2 hours every other weekend.

 

It won't be what you wish for, however positive observations by the contact centre could be used to your advantage as witness statements to counteract allegations by your ex.

 

You could consider enquire with a few local contact centres and propose them to your ex. Some contact is better than no contact and will make the transition to unsupervised contact quicker when the time comes. 

Cafcass have recommended no contact in the interim. And the ex is using that to her advantage and refusing contact.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 29/04/2022 6:09 am

(@bill337)
Illustrious Member

@dadlad thats a shame. They often like to play hard ball like that. When is your next hearing?

ReplyQuote
Posted : 29/04/2022 3:19 pm
(@champagne)
Honorable Member

@dadlad Hang on in there.  Hopefully there will be a better outcome at the next hearing

ReplyQuote
Posted : 29/04/2022 3:20 pm
DadLad and DadLad reacted

top tips to support your child after breakup

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