I have been reading some of the bloggs and feel for you guys that are really struggling with contact with your kids.
My son saw his daughter for 10 mins when she was born but then his ex decided that he or us as grand parents could not see her. As soon as she recieved the C100 she slapped a non molestation order on my son, saying he had abused her throughout their 6 month relationship! So she then had legal aid and my son had to pay nearly £4k for legal advice. Anyway long story short, at the final court hearing (which isnt final as he has to go back in June!), he had a brilliant judge who said he would not do the non molestation order, he would only accept an undertaking from both of them to be nice to each other and not put anything on facebook. My sons barrister advised this was the best way forward and that he wasnt admitting the non mol. So they finally just agreed on this. The judge also said that my sons ex should not be stopping paternal family and indeed the babys dad from seeing her. As apparently she is being breast fed every 40 mins (the judge told mum to sort that out as this was not acceptable!) my son was granted an hour on Saturday, Monday and Wednesday with 20 mins travelling time each day. This is fine for now as my son needs to get to know his daughter. It was a bit tough as she had not spent any time away from her mum, but now after 3 weeks she is happy when she visits and my son is spending some quality time with her. When they go back in June they have the same judge and my son is delighted. Having the right person in that chair makes all the difference. He was even given parental rights whilst at court and is now on the birth certificate.
There was a time when i thought dads who didnt want to see their kids were a waste of space, how wrong was I, I didnt realise that most of the time, not all, but most of the time its the mum stopping the dad from seeing the kids. I can see things from a totally different perspective now and I hope all you dads (or even mums if the boot is on the other foot) out there do get to have quality time with your kids. My son is a different person now that he has his daughter in his life and we know that its going to be a long road ahead, We could not have done any of this without the help of everyone on this website. We had lots of valuable advice and support.
Even though I will probably be after some more help in the future, I would like to wish everyone who is having a battle at the moment the very best of luck, keep going, eventually you will get somewhere, it may not be what you want at the moment, but keep doing it for yourself and your kids.
Thank you to everyone who gave such valuable advice, signing off for the time being, but I'll be back....