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[Solved] Non Molestation order

 
sid4u
(@sid4u)
Trusted Member Registered

My Ex has served me with a non molesation order and is relying on a statement that was previously used in a original contact case where she was proved to non credible. All her allegations was unfounded. However she has got this temporarily in place.

The reason are she is jealous that i have takjen my 7 year old son on holiay to Dubai - he returned to his mother for two days after the holiday, I was served and he camke back to me disgruntles and suddenly a strong hate for me. Basically his mother was brainwashing me and making him read the witness statement and was saying things word for word. Second reason is she knows that i have moved on married again doing well and happy without her.

She is interfering with my contact, stopping me from speaking with him, breaching the orders by not giving me passport until last minute, brainwashing my son, also trying to control or dictate contact to me - in my mind she needs to be sectioned, she is mental and wanted to reconciliate a couple of years ago and get together again. When i refused a few weeks later she tried to pin on the fact she was possessed and had to get healed by a spirutal healer.

Im frustrated incredibly by this habitual liar, its been 7 years what is her game or motive - she cant move on why? She is claiming that i am threatening and violent to her when i never see her, i collect and drop off my son to school except holidays which when i have to see her she creates drama then plays victim, I have sent her some strong emails in response to her stupidity but i have never been aggressive or threatening or sugested violence. To her as soon as i respond with seriousness she calls its abuse. Its all theatrics, immature and i cant take it seriously but i must.

I contested it in court and find myself preparing huge bundles of files and referring back to the old case bundle where her witness statements where she was proven a liar. Its just a mountain of rubbish responding to this.
I have to go back in 2 weeks do i have real justification to have this revoked or ami facing automatic injunction just because she says so and feels the need for protecting of something that doesnt exist. if calling someone stupid serious, or stop playing games, etc serious I have history of police logs where she is harassing me, and a seriosu allegation last year where she claims i punched her in the stomach (never happened), she actuially assaulted me and i have a police log for assault. I should have pressed charges to arrest but didnt because good officer told me that it wont look good if you arrest her with your son present!

I have to get a fact find,m cafcass need to get involved in the next directions - do non mol get beat im quite worried and anxious particulalry worried if she gets her way and removed contact. Im not guilty but given the system always puts you as guilty then i have to disprove.

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Topic starter Posted : 08/10/2019 2:17 am
Greengage
(@Greengage)
Trusted Member Registered

Do exactly what you did before with the previous Non-Mol application.

If you can afford any representation it is worth having it as your ex is hoping that she gets a judge who is more sympathetic to her wants.

In regards to her tricks about around contact you cannot control her in regards to the crap she tells your son and if she refuses to allow you to speak to him at her home due to his age.

What you can control is how you respond to her.

So you need to ignore her unless it is an emergency.

This means no phoning your son at her house and no answering any of messages/emails.

Once she realises you won't engage with her she will stop.

There is a thread with a letter on this forum which is worth sending her once you have dealt with the Non-Molestation Order. (I will see if I can dig it out.)

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Posted : 09/10/2019 12:35 pm
sid4u
(@sid4u)
Trusted Member Registered

Thank you for your response, helpful.

Update to my hearing was that I was treated as if I was guilty before magistrates and the clerk. They was rushing the proceedings as they had made us wait over 4 hours and had another 3 to see. They basically stated that the allegations are not unfounded from the previous case due to these being new allegations. So proves they don't read your material or statements. They did in fact inform me that although im contesting I have admitted that I have called her derogatory names, even though there was one occasion in a text I called her 'd!ck head. But this was after he deliberate obstrusion of not passing me the passport, collecting her son, brainwashing him and attempting to start a fight. No evidence to suggest any threatening or violent behaviour.

They may just find that this is enough against me, and I admit I fell for the trap! My current non mol is in place until Feb 2020 however the trial hearing date for it is 5 days before it expires. great isn't it she can lie on a whim and put an injunction on you because she herself is useless and is getting rewarded for being so.

Anyway they also told me on the day that I have another hearing to attend to as she has lodged a enforcement order of my child arrangement order. She is stating that I am breaching the order when im not.

My order allows me to speak with my son in the week over the phone, she doesn't get that privilege when he is with me as I only get him every other weekend.

If you could locate and share the letter that would be appreciated.

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Topic starter Posted : 13/11/2019 12:51 am
sid4u
(@sid4u)
Trusted Member Registered

As an update, my crazy ex was bombarding me with emails that inwas breaching my order that i sought. Claiming i never returned the passport in time, and also becaise i had to have a new one made at short notice not returning the old expired one. As a result the non mol and child arrangement order was filed and i sought to have them dealt together. During the day before the judge as my bundle was preoared i was incredibly confident that it will all be sqasued based on all and new evidences and with my cincerns based on her baseless lack of evidence seriously question her mental stability particularly with her possession story as mentioned by cafcass. As a result she decided to dismiss all cases on grounds that its causing my son conflict. I was disapointed because having prepared and ready to protect myself i knew she would not have a leg to stand on. Its aslo all a ploy fir her to have cintrol over me as she feels she can drag me out and take me to court as she wants. Any attention is attention for her.

I will be seeking to take a harassment and non mol against her as she keeps bombarding me with text and messages that i am abusing her and now my son. Its affecred me massively emotionally and mentally over 10 years wearing ke down. I cannot cooe and live like this. Why she messages me not the authorities i never understand. What steos do i take to do this i have plenty of evidence. Time has proven i cannot co-parent with a emmotiinall immayire unhealthy person that is toxic and counter parenting. Its actually good for her when we go no contact and its worked oerfectly for 3 years where she and i dont see each other and i have to accept no indorect calls with my son by blocking her completely. In 10 years she has not moved on and let go of this control whilst i am moved on maried and other chidlren.

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Topic starter Posted : 26/11/2021 1:35 am
Bill337
(@bill337)
Famed Member

hi,

I think you have every right to apply for a non-molestation order if she keeps on messaging you and harassing you. but a problem is she could play tit for tat and stop you seeing child if you apply for one. you could speak to police about it and ask them to give her a warning.

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Posted : 26/11/2021 11:02 am
sid4u
(@sid4u)
Trusted Member Registered

@bill337 it worked previously for a couple of years as i just simply blocked her on all forms of communication picked him from school dropped him iff school, and just turned up as the order stated. I need a clearly defined order and a non mol so she cannot and does not contact me. I dont want to be her counsellor where she feels like she can message alleging i am abusing her or my son or her delluded lies. Go speak to a counsellor or authorities if your abused why are you messaging me for?? I will need to get my son his own phone to carry out indirect contact. This is more for her as shr cannit cope because like a true NPD they have to make it about themselves and create attention. She thrn delludes herself that she has a chance of getting back together and starts using wellbeing of our son to just talk nonsense. I need it to stay sane.We have had conflict for 10years why she claiming my son wanted us to have dinner is lies and beyond me. He is barely comfortbale seeing us speak amicably.

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Topic starter Posted : 26/11/2021 5:02 pm
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