[Solved] Feel awkward around the new girl
A new girl started in our office, she's going to be on my team. She's sooo hot! And the point of this thread is how I'm going to deal with how much I fancy her.
She's the sister of one of the managers, and I was already gunna be cautious due to that, but at the same time we're adults, so ultimately I don't care what he or anyone else thinks (although he's a nice guy and I like him).
Long story short, she started training about 3 weeks ago, and in that time we've become to know each other, been for coffee and lunch together a couple of times. She's only recently came out of a 5 year relationship. I know this because she's gotten very personal telling me all about it.
The problem is I've rapidly developed the hugest crush on her, and as a result I'm now not being my 100% usual self around her. I feel nervous and anxious like I have to keep talking to her and saying cool things to impress her more than the other lads in the office that are trying to impress her.
Another factor is some of the other guys in the office act like clowns to get laughs and although I'm very funny without having to actively behave like a class clown, I refuse to "compete" with these other clowns, 1 or 2 of whom are supposed to be my friends.
I'm a big boy and I'll suck it up and deal with it, but I was just hoping I could get some advice.
Just be yourself, if not, the true self always emerges sooner or later.
t's hard work trying to impress someone, it can make a person feel awkward, stressed and can give a false image and that would not be a desirable thing to do and it can be counter productive.
Let her see the type of man you are and your natural qualities, don't let them get blurred by trying to compete with other chaps trying to vie for her attention.
A natural good sense of humour is a valuable asset, we all like to laugh.
Thanks yea I've been thinking the same thing. The last thing I want to do is try to be someone I'm not. It was just that for a few days there my crush on her was overwhelming to the point it was affecting my natural self and I felt like I was doing and saying stupid things around her. You know, nerves and stuff.
Circumstances have changed though, and things are feeling better than they were before.
I'm now partnered up with her. As I'm off for 3 weeks from next week I promised her I'd spend the rest of the week helping her whilst she eases into the new job. So, I'm literally sat beside her all day long coaching her and being her fall-back as she talks to customers on the phone.
Oh yeah, about the 3 weeks I'm taking off, she really doesn't like this and would much prefer it if I stayed. It does pain me to leave at this time, but it's a project I just can't afford to miss out on as it's worth 5k. She has joked that she's going to get her manager brother to make me stay. She just really wants and needs me there, and I really wish I was able to, but the timing was just wrong. We have been having touchy feely light hearted inside jokes etc, stuff that makes me want her more.
Aside from this, things are mostly cool now and my anxiety is evaporating. Except for small things like I get a jealous feeling when any other guys flirt with her, particularly one who is my friend, he's basically a rival in this instance as all 3 of us are single.
She also brought me in a gift today. A really good set of headphones her family brought her back from holiday last week. I told her I needed a new set and she gave me them. So generous of her.
I'm just going to do my best to train her as best I can over the next 2 days so that she's more confident in the job, because as I'm leaving for 3 weeks I do feel bad for her because she want's me to be there more than anyone else. I do think the 3 days coaching her will build somewhat of a bond, but then it's being severed by my 3 weeks off. I'm also worried the 3 weeks will change things in a negative way. But hopefully not.
I'll be keeping in touch with her during the 3 weeks though.