Me and my wife are going through a divorce, we have two children together which live with her at the moment and I have them when I can.
I got forced out of the family house by her but due to a change in my circumstances I’m going to have to move back into the family house.
I’ve been to a solicitor and they said I am able to move back in to the family house (my name is on the mortgage).
all bills will be split and the children will be 50/50.
my question is,
how do I inform my wife that I will be moving back in to the family house in a respectful way?
I guess it depends on what kind of relationship you have with your wife but I would probably try to arrange a one-to-one chat with her. Explain your situation and ask if she is amicable to allowing you to move back in. (In other words, ask for permission first, rather than using imperatives based on your rights).
It might help if you are able to put a rough timespan on it. I would probably take that kind of gentle approach and if and only if that fails as a back up plan, you can bring up your advice from the solicitors. Getting her agreement will hopefully help to make the next chapter more peaceful.
This is just one idea based on imagining myself in your shoes - you probably need to tailor whatever you do to your unique situation and sounding off ideas with friends/family that know you both might help too.
Best of Luck.
Have you thought of going to mediation to deal with the divorce? That might also help with the housing situation. If the solicitors are being aggressive with each other, she may not be very amenable to you moving back. Is there a separate bedroom you can use? She may apply for a non molestation order to stop you from coming back to the house. That will depend on the circumstances leading to your break-up.
is a non molestation if there has been abuse? If so none has been give what’s so ever.
There is a spare room that I can stay in, we are going through mediation at the moment and the last mediation session she said about me having the children 50/50 and the only way of doing that is moving back in to the family house. This is only going to be temporary till we can get the house up and sold but I can’t have the children where I am at the moment as my mum only has one spare room and isn’t well enough to cope with the stress of two children living there.
the police have never been involved at all on either part.
Its good that you are having mediation and that you are trying hard for the breakup to be the best possible for everyone. Yes, there has to be abuse to get a non molestation order and if thats not happened then you can discuss moving back in at your next mediation if you feel it might be hard to ask her out of a session.