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[Solved] new child

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AlexandraReid
(@AlexandraReid)
New Member Registered

Her behavior seems to be very weird, however it's okay unless you can see your child

actually, now I think that it depends on the child and his wishes as well, lol, sorry for this update, i wanted to edit the message

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Posted : 29/10/2020 1:15 am
nobitabre82
(@nobitabre82)
New Member Registered

Just got my daughter for the first time from the hospital.

The moment I lay her down on her crib she started crying so my wife breastfeed her. After feeding she started crying again so we feed her again then after that she cried again, so I checked her diapers and then burped her but she won't stop crying.

After feeding her again she stopped and went to sleep for a few hours..

All the while me and my wife are panicking because we both have no idea what to do, this is our first day alone with our daughter and we're already stressed out. Our house is a mess, we couldn't cook a meal because we keep watching our baby and I have to go work in a few hours without sleep and leaving my panicking wife alone with the baby.. I had to beg my mother to stay at our house to help my wife.

Holy hell... This is waaay harder than I thought it was. I have been searching the internet for tips and help, but I figured I rather have first hand tips from here than articles on google..

Also we couldn't figure out why we can't properly swaddle our baby even after watching dozens of YouTube videos, we feel so dumb.

Thanks.!

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Posted : 29/10/2020 10:47 am
Bill337
(@bill337)
Famed Member

hi,

are you in UK? usually a couple of days after child's birth, a mid wife/health visitor turns up to do checks on child. That's an ideal time for you to ask for help or let them know of any concerns.

there's some helpful tips here:

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/being-a-parent/

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Posted : 29/10/2020 4:50 pm
Clarinet
(@clarinet)
Estimable Member Registered

Hello nobitabre82,
May I say congratulations on the safe arrival of your newly born little girl! Well done in asking for some guidance, it's not always an easy thing to do.
Here are a few pointers which you may find useful, that are from personal experience, but also what I have learned from speaking with other families.
1. Becoming a new parent can be really overwhelming, so please don't be hard on yourselves. Remember to keep communication open between each other, if one of you is really down, then the other should try to encourage and if possible see if there is anything practical they can do to help in the situation.
2.Accept that you can't do it all. Asses your priorities - does your home need to be spotless each day? or can you just make time to have a more detailed clean once a week to do vacuuming, surfaces, bins, bathroom etc.
3. Use the services of the health visitors and midwifes as much as you can in the early weeks and months. They have a mind of information and organisations to which they can sign post you if you need extra help. There are breastfeeding groups online, there to help also if your wife would like some support with feeding.
4. Keep a close eye on each others mental health, and please don't be afraid to see your GP if you are feeling down, or anxious etc. I speak from personal experience here. Talking is good, and with the right help, things can improve.
5. Would you have some willing friends who would be able to cook a few meals for you for say a couple of weeks? This way you can both concentrate on just functioning and looking after baby.
6.Whilst you are at work, encourage your wife to sleep and rest when the baby sleeps. This is very early days, and with her being the person who is doing the feeding, she will need to keep her energy levels up as much as she can. Also encourage your wife to drink water and eat regularly too.
7. When you have your work shifts, is it possible for you to sleep in another room just to get some solid sleep? Your baby will settle into a sleep pattern - the bigger she gets the more food she will take on at a time, and the more alert she becomes for periods of time, then she will sleep better. Hang on in there !
8. If your mum is happy to help out sometimes, why not see of she can have baby for a couple of hours in between feeds so you can both rest? It may not be possible just yet as your daughter is so little, but eventually when she can go longer in between feeds, this could work well.
9. Try to remember that other people have been through what you are going through - life with a newborn. Do you have someone you could turn to at work to chat with if you're feeling overwhelmed ? Others will be able to remember what it's like not to have sleep. Ask for their tips too!
10. Finally - it is a cliché, but try to hold onto what I call a "golden nugget" from each day. Keep a little notebook and write down a word or sentence of something good that has happened. E.g." baby slept for three hours and we had a rest!" or when this happens -"baby smiled today for the first time!"

Be kind to yourselves, live one day at a time, or one hour at a time, and give yourselves a pat on the back when you make it through another day of the adventure that is parenthood! There are a couple of excellent organisations you can look up online that have all kinds of information for parents. These are Fegans and Care For The Family.
Hope I've not sent you to sleep! Kind Regards,
Fegans Parent Support Volunteer.

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Posted : 29/10/2020 11:19 pm
AlexandraReid
(@AlexandraReid)
New Member Registered

first months of a child are the most difficult, actually. At least, from the mother's perspective, I can say that seeing father is very important. We have divorced when our baby was a few months old, it was okay and the decision was made mutually. The only thing I was really concerned about is how our child would survive without my milk when his father took him for a weekend or just for a few hours. We figured out that goat milk formula is pretty useful in such situations. Great that we've discovered this online shop with the organic baby food.

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Posted : 30/10/2020 3:03 am
nobitabre82
(@nobitabre82)
New Member Registered

are you in UK? usually a couple of days after child's birth, a mid wife/health visitor turns up to do checks on child. That's an ideal time for you to ask for help or let them know of any concerns.

thankyou so much!!

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Posted : 30/10/2020 11:34 am
nelly34
(@nelly34)
New Member Registered

The first days of an infant at home are the most difficult period, because not only the newborn needs to adapt to the new world, but also his parents. Moms get their first skills in caring for a baby in the maternity home, but when they get home, many are at a loss as to how to properly care for their newborn. Diapers are the absolute helpers for moms

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Posted : 17/02/2022 12:21 pm
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