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School confidentiality

 
(@warhammer)
Estimable Member Registered

Hello I’ve just found out that my ex has asked my child’s school teacher, if I attended parent evening. They told her that I had not. Should they have discussed this with her? She is now trying to use this against me in court.

I didn’t attend because I didn’t get a invite. The teachers know our situation and normally invite us both separately, never been a problem before. This year however I wasn’t contacted. They may have put a letter in my child’s school bag, but if this was on a night he was with my ex, she wouldn’t tell me.

my ex works in the playground at the school.

I’m so upset and want to address this with the school, but don’t know where I stand?

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 06/12/2022 10:53 pm
(@bill337)
Famed Member

Hi,

If you have a court order and it does not forbid you from contacting school then you can phone school and ask to be kept informed about important events like parents evening. You could ask them to email you with information. If you know roughly when they hold parents evenings, you could put reminder in your phone calendar, to call them and ask when parents evening will be happening.

How are your court hearings going? You could ask them to put something in the order for your ex to keep you updated with school progress reports/activities.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 07/12/2022 5:57 pm
(@warhammer)
Estimable Member Registered

Hi thanks for reply. I normally go it’s only this one I didn’t know about. Previous teachers know the situation and would send me an appointment. I go to most school events. I have phoned the school and asked to speak to the teacher involved, I was told she would phone me at 3.30pm, but she hasn’t. I will see what she says about this. I know my ex is looking for evidence to discredit me. All in preparation for our next court hearing which is very soon. There has been a court order in place already for several years, I’m the applicant looking to vary the order.

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 07/12/2022 7:36 pm
Clarinet
(@clarinet)
Estimable Member Registered

Hello Warhammer,

I would suggest that you request a separate appointment with your child's school, to try and get to the bottom of where the mis communication has occurred, regarding the parents evening. I would also encourage the school to not give out any details to your child's Mum unless urgent. As one post suggests, giving the school your email and asking them to inform you separatley of important, if not all, school meetings and events, thus saving any confusion or lack of communication.

I think the important issue here is for the school to respect your confidentiality, especially as you say that your ex-partner works at the school.

 

all the best, Fegans Parent Support. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 08/12/2022 5:30 pm
(@warhammer)
Estimable Member Registered

@clarinet I’ve spoken to the teacher, she confirms ex asked her, she said she wasn’t aware of our situation. She confirmed paper copies of everything are put in school bag, didn’t realise that could mean I wouldn’t get copy or be told. They now have my email and will send me everything.teacher was a bit shocked when i said you’ve been named in a court statement, 😳. 

Thanks for the support. 

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 10/12/2022 9:13 pm
Clarinet
(@clarinet)
Estimable Member Registered

@warhammer 

hello again, thanks for the update. That’s good that the school are now fully aware of the situation. I hope this avoids any extra upset and confusion for you. Keep communicating with the school and remember that they are there for you as much as for your ex partner in regards to all matters about your child. 
kind regards.
ReplyQuote
Posted : 12/12/2022 10:41 am
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