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Family based arrangement backdate

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Hi, wondering if anyone knows the answer to this before I seek legal advice.

Years ago the ex went to CMS and they send me a yearly letter with the amount they advise me to pay, however in between this we decided on an amount that I should pay monthly between ourselves given that I buy my kids whatever they want and take them on holidays etc. 

My child is 16 now and has decided to work rather than go into further education so my payments now stop although I have said that I will continue to help my son out directly with money.

The ex who is now going to be out of pocket is saying that although we had a family arrangement which was less than the recommended amount on the letters from CMA she wants the difference between what we agreed and what the letters said.


Where do I stand on this? We had nothing in writing to prove the amount we agreed between ourselves however the fact that she has accepted this amount for years and not complained or contacted CMA surley should prove we had an agreement in place? 

I hope the above makes sense and would appreciate advice or anyone who has been through something similar.. Thanks

Topic starter Posted : 19/09/2023 7:23 am
Illustrious Member


So in this situation perhaps she would want your maintenance payments to stay in place as long as possible. If CMS case is still open, she can opt to use their payment plan and guidelines. You can contact cms and ask if child benefit case is still open. If it is then they will expect you to carry on paying maintenance.  If you think child benefit claim should have been closed, then you can make a report to HMRC/child benefits office. 

Posted : 19/09/2023 3:21 pm
Active Member Registered
You may or may not be liable for the difference between what you agreed to pay and what the CMS recommended. As I know, verbal agreements can be just as binding as written agreements. The CMS is not the only way to get child maintenance payments. If you have been paying a certain amount of child maintenance for a long period of time, this may be evidence of an agreement.

If you and your ex-partner are able to reach an agreement on child maintenance, it is a good idea to put it in writing. This will help to avoid any disputes in the future.

Posted : 22/09/2023 4:14 pm

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