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What is covered in private agreement

New Member Registered


Fairly new here. I've been searching through the forums and can't find an answer.

I left my partner in January and using the government calculator we both independently worked out how much I should pay her a month which works out roughly a quarter of my monthly take home.

I'm paying about £30pm more than that figure as to make it a round number and as a gesture of good will.

The problem now is that we have different opinions on what that money covers.

She asked me to cover half the cost of school uniform and I begrudgingly (but without fuss) paid it.

Now its glasses and contact lenses. Where does it end??

As I can't find anything online stating exactly what is covered I have a sinking feeling we will have to talk to each other and come to an agreement (because those conversations are always stress free🤣).

Also I'm staying at my sisters house at the moment but when I get my own place (which should hopefully be in the next month or so) we will be going 50/50 with child care.

Can anyone shed some light on the situation now and any recommendations for when we go 50/50?


Thank you in advance


Topic starter Posted : 14/08/2022 1:23 pm
Famed Member

hi, i think the amount your paying as per calculator should cover the monthly child maintenance costs, including uniform, contact lenses etc. if you want to pay extra, thats up to you. once you go 50/50 childcare then technically you should not be paying her anything. she will probably not be happy about this and go open a case with Child maintenance service.

Posted : 14/08/2022 5:32 pm
New Member Registered

Hi Guys,

I posted this in another forum before I came across this one which is more along the lines of what I am looking for advice on.

I am new to DAD info, only signed up today in fact as I have been looking for some support with regards to where I stand in terms of the amount of child maintenance I am paying the mother of my two children.

I left my ex in June 2020 and we decided that our children would reside with the mother and I see my boys every morning Monday to Wednesday where I take them to child minders so that the mother can go to work as I can drop them before go to work also and they stay with me every other weekend (Friday night to Monday morning) plus every Thursday night.

I have been paying £300 per month on time without fail which is roughly £60 more than what she is legally entitled to even though my yearly salary doesn't warrant the £300 and she's now asking for more money towards the costs of school uniform but can afford to take them away on holiday for a week at the start of the summer holiday's even though she works part time and gets universal credit which in the grand scheme of things she is getting three sources of income, salary-universal credit and CM.

Can anyone help on this as to where I stand?

To add to this, like the gentleman above I also pay for birthday party presents when and if parties that my boys are invited to fall on my weekends with me. 

Many thanks


This post was modified 2 months ago by Andyt79
Posted : 18/08/2022 3:10 pm

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