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Hi , I have recently separated and now looking after 4 boys (. 16,14,13,11) my x is applying for child arrangement (C100) and a occupation order . Can someone please help.
hi,
ok so the 4 boys are living with you right? has your ex left the house or both of you are still there?
you should contact a solicitor and get legal advice. many offer 30 mins-1 hour free consultation.
i don't know much about occupation orders, but due to your kids ages, their views will be taken into account by the family court. if your kids say they want to live with dad, then courts will likely go with that, do not be tempted to put any thoughts or words in your kids mouth. there are few options, you can fight for kids to live with your full-time and your ex opposes that and vice versa. or you can do a 50/50 shared care arrangement.
She has left the house and now wanting to move back in . The kids wish to stay with me . They have mentioned that to social services.
Many thanks for your advice much appreciate it .
Your ex may have already obtained legal advice. Under no circumstances let your ex move back in. you will find within days/weeks she will have house and you will be on the street. where your children are more than old enough... if the older two alone want to live with you and not mum its more likely you will end up with all 4 children as they will want to stay together.
Also if your ex gets back in the house she knows she will be able to get all the benefits possible available which she wont at moment.
Your ex wont get an occupation order unless all 4 children wish to reside with herself. also she has now chose to leave the house
Many thanks for your advice .
She left in August 2019 , saw the children after 6 weeks . I tried for the sake of the children for 3 months and then gave up , she last saw the children in October 2019 and to date hasn’t seen them . She has not made any attempt to work with social services and they have now after 5months completed there report excluding her say . She has now realised that without the children she has nothing as where she is staying ends in February. She now wants to attend all meetings concerning schools and I have my doubts about her . Whilst she was with us she said she wanted to be single and went to a refuge. She didn’t want these boys as they were a burden and now she wants to come back in there lives ,,, I do not trust her .
I don't blame you for not trusting her. she made a major mess and now wants to work her way back in the house. let your guard down and things can change quickly. if she wants to know how they are doing she can contact school for information just like dads have to. arranging contact she can do that herself by contacting boys. you have no reason really to have contact with her at all unless to do with younger children
Many thanks mate , well I’ll be seeing her on Wednesday at the school meeting with the social worker . I will ask to be in another room as she is currently made a molestation order.
I am glad i came to this forum you guys give me hope .
It will look much better for you if you inform the people at meeting that she is subject to a non molestation order before it starts.
It may well be that meeting will still go ahead with both of you present and that non molestation order maybe put to one side .
I gather the idea of meeting is you all work together with childrens best interest at the front of your mind. meeting probably wont last long ..sounds like a child in need meeting if a social worker is there. the more you work together the quicker the meetings will be discontinued
I hope she doesn’t get custody of the children , she has put them through enough and they have seen certain things they should not have on her phone . The children exposed her (3 boys) the eldest refused to see what was on her phone . All 3 boys have been referred to mental health workers . My concern mainly is this child arrangement and occupation order. I under she had applied for the C100. Do I need to submit one myself although the children are in my care ? Or can I attend court and get the C100 to work in my favour?
All you got to do is put children 1st and don't run mum down. work with social services and keep them on side. let her do all the mud slinging. if she has put a c100 in and occupation order all you can do is wait until you see what comes of it. if things aren't going in her favour and social services have concerns then it will come to nothing. the longer it is left and children are happy and meeting all expectations the harder it will be for her
Many thanks for the support I am receiving
Unfortunately the child in need meeting has been cancelled today. The social worker has been assigned to another team . Mom hasn’t confirmed meeting anyway. New social worker will be attending next meeting.
Thanks guys for your support