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Advice needed - wife moved out

 
mjallen
(@mjallen)
New Member Registered

Hi, 

I was wondering if anyone could offer some general advice on going through a separation. 

Background info:

The family house was bought after marriage and is solely in my name as she was at uni whilst we bought it. The deposit came from my student loan and money from my family. 

My wife has now moved out of the family home and back in with her parents. We live near her parents as my family are 200 odd miles away so it was agreed by both parties that it would be her that moved out. At the moment she is ok with this but I would like to know what my rights are if she decides she wanted to move back in, which atm she does not. 

Also regarding child maintenance as we have the children 50% some weeks I actually have them more than her am I right in saying I am not required to pay her child maintenance? We will both be providing clothes, food etc separately and equally. 

We are planning to sell the house and split the equity 50/50 and hopefully keep the solicitors and courts out of it but I guess it’s early days and things and emotions can change quickly. 

Thanks 

 

Quote
Topic starter Posted : 14/08/2022 4:02 pm
mrstrange
(@mrstrange)
Estimable Member Registered

Sorry to hear that your relationship has ended.

You are asking all the right questions. Things can indeed start amicable but change very quickly. Be amicable in hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

Great that she has moved out. For peace of mind, you could apply for an occupation order. This will prohibit her from entering or being in th vicinity of the property without your permission. Furthermore it protect you from her doing exactly this to you.

 

Some house keeping tips:

-Be as nice and as amicable as possible.

-For record keeping, stick to written communication as much as possible.

-Don't be lured into escalating discussions or rattled by negative remarks/insults by her.

-CMS count over-nights. Keep a diary of these.

 

-Don't fight every single battle but weigh each one against risk of spending £xx,xxx in legal fees on the divorce. 

 

-For the children's and your best interest, I would aim to seek to remain the property for 1 year to allow some stability for the children during the transition and ensure that you are in the strongest position for a 50:50 claim. 

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14/08/2022 5:30 pm

Bill337
(@bill337)
Famed Member

hi, technically with 50/50 childcare you shouldn't have to pay her maintenance. hopefully you can keep things amicable and away from courts and child support system.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 14/08/2022 5:51 pm
mjallen
(@mjallen)
New Member Registered

Thanks for the advice. It has helped to settle my mind. 

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 15/08/2022 7:48 am

top tips to support your child after breakup

jamesgwyther
(@jamesgwyther)
Active Member Registered

sorry 🙁

 

Me and my wife have broken up but currently still living together...

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15/08/2022 9:37 am
mrstrange
(@mrstrange)
Estimable Member Registered

@mjallen

Don't count your eggs just yet until you have 50:50 agreed in a consent order or through court. 

 

Although your ex is amicable, she will inevitably have to speak to a solicitor. They are bound to give her ideas.

 

In case you don't know, she could apply for an occupation order and the court could grant her permission to occupy the family home for 1 year until she's found a new home. This would flip everything on its head. As a cherry on top, she would also apply for a non molesterion order.

 

If I were you I would consider applying for an occupation for peace of mind. Alternatively speak to a solicitor to prepare for unforseen changes in direction.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15/08/2022 12:36 pm

how contact centres work

mjallen
(@mjallen)
New Member Registered

@mrstrange thanks for the advice. 

So even if I have the kids 50/50 or even more than her. This week I’m having them 60/40 she could kick me out the family home.. seems very unreasonable as she is living with her parents and has a roof over her head already. 

in regards to the occupation order I have had a look and they seem to centre around domestic violence, what if there hasn’t been any.. can you share a link of the specific order I need? 

ReplyQuote
Topic starter Posted : 15/08/2022 12:44 pm
mrstrange
(@mrstrange)
Estimable Member Registered

@mjallen 

The law and dynamics of separating as a married couple can be significantly more acrimonious than for unmarried couples.

 

Your ex can allege that you bullied/forced her out of the house against your will. The court would grant a non molestation and occupation orders in the interim until the divorce and child arrangements have been finalised which can take 7-18 months.

 

This is not be scare montering but it can be useful to be aware of the scenarios that typically play out for separated couples. Be optimistic but also plan for the unexpected as Divorce, CAO and Financial Remedy have not been sealed by the courts for you two. 

 

Spend a bit of time to understand the family court process for seperating couples. Basic knowledge can also save you money and time when dealing with solicitors and barristers. 

FL401 is the application form for occupation orders.

ReplyQuote
Posted : 15/08/2022 1:08 pm

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